


Stay

by RollyPratt, UntoldGalaxies



Series: RollyPratt & UntoldGalaxies Collabs 💖 [4]
Category: Life with Derek
Genre: Co-Written, Dorms, Drinking Games, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Getting Together, Love Confessions, Mutual Pining, Porn with Feelings, Some Plot, Step-siblings, University
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:08:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 29,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27401734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RollyPratt/pseuds/RollyPratt, https://archiveofourown.org/users/UntoldGalaxies/pseuds/UntoldGalaxies
Summary: "It’s intense. Like you’re drawn to someone so much it hurts to stay away. Like your lungs are being crushed. You can't stop thinking about them when they're not around. And when they are? It's… like a spark could set the whole room on fire.”
Relationships: Casey McDonald/Derek Venturi
Series: RollyPratt & UntoldGalaxies Collabs 💖 [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1902082
Comments: 70
Kudos: 119





	Stay

**Author's Note:**

> For those still getting to know us, this is what happens when we decide to do a "short" writing exercise to try and stir up the creative flow: we end up with almost 30k of smut and fluff.
> 
> You will notice (many) tswift references, since folklore was a big inspiration for the mood of this piece.
> 
> So yeah, this is what we've been doing this whole time during our break from Intersecting Lines. We think you'll like it.
> 
> Moodboard made by the lovely [binxxx](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Binxxx/profile). <3

Like a lovesick idiot, Derek waited for Casey outside her dorm, same as he did every day after her evening class. It was becoming more and more apparent how hopeless he truly was as the leaves changed colours and the snow began to fall, and he found himself waiting in the cold November wind, warming up his hands with his breath.

Braving the cold was better than the alternative though. It wasn't like he could stay _away_ from her; he’d _tried_ that already. He'd kept a strict distance between them during their entire first year of University, in a desperate attempt to forget about her - a self-imposed restraining order of sorts. But that had backfired dramatically. No matter what he did, she crept into his mind and stayed there, like her stubborn nature demanded, and it only got worse and worse as time went on.

Over last summer, when she was inserted back into his life unwittingly, they fell back into old patterns, like a force of nature that could not be quelled. It only took a few days for him to give up completely and stop trying so damn hard to distance himself, and life became _fun_ again; he had missed their rivalry - their teasing, competitive dynamic. He had missed _her_.

As it turned out, he was happier living recklessly, passionately and playing with fire than he was when he deprived himself completely. So, consequences be damned, he decided that he was going to go after what he wanted.

Namely, Casey.

This daily ritual of showing up at her doorstep was part of his master plan to get closer to her and sweep her off her clumsy little feet. He knew it would take time, and that it wouldn’t be easy, given their history and other _complications_ , but he was prepared to play the long game (and enjoy the ride in the meantime).

As she approached her dorm building, Casey couldn’t escape the little jump of her heart when she saw him there, leaning casually against the brick wall with his trendy ripped jeans and Rolling Stones t-shirt, leather jacket and hipster scarf hanging from his neck.

The fact that he was there again, looking suspiciously like an ad for Levi’s, didn’t surprise her anymore, because it was turning into a habit ever since their second year started. But it never failed to fill her with warmth when she found him there.

It was a stark contrast from last year, when she barely saw him. Sometimes she would spot him around the quad, trying to catch his eye, yet he had never spared her a glance, like she had turned invisible. It wasn’t as dramatic as she made it sound, but she had never felt more empty and alone as when he wouldn’t look at her.

She never got to find out why they drifted apart, too afraid to ask, but since reuniting in the same house for the summer, and that last night at home when they had sat together on the back porch, she felt that something was different. He started showing up, and it was like she got back something important that she’d been missing. She got _him_ back.

And now he was there; he was _always_ there, waiting for her - after her evening class or late after hockey practice. As if he didn’t have anywhere better to be. As if she was his girlfriend or something.

Casey rolled her eyes at herself and squashed that thought down, pushing it into a drawer inside her mind against all the others (she struggled to shut it closed).

She had too many of those kinds of thoughts lately, which was dangerous for so many reasons. First and foremost, she couldn’t risk getting her feelings mixed up and ruin whatever kind of friendship they had built in the last few months. Not when she’d experienced a full year without him and knew that she couldn’t stand to lose him again. There was still a little bit of fear at the back of her mind that one day, he would stop showing up.

Ignoring the pounding in her chest, she composed herself, pinching her flushed cheeks - too warm to the touch considering the cold breeze falling upon them. She really didn’t need him knowing how flustered he made her, or any of the incriminating thoughts floating around in her mind.

Derek spotted her walking towards him and smirked at her anxious demeanour. It was the perfect starting point for an evening of flirty teasing and he couldn’t wait to exploit it to get a rise out of her.

The fact that his very presence made her so _nervous_ , when she should really be used to it by now, was proof that what he was doing was not yet another futile exercise.

He could tell she felt _something_ for him; he could read it in her body’s reactions to him and the hidden meaning behind her words. All he needed to do was shine a light on those reactions. That way, they could stop living in the _denial_ phase. Preferably before some other, _uncomplicated_ guy came along with relatively minimal effort to steal her heart from his reach.

"Took you long enough." He grinned when she finally arrived. "You almost got me arrested for loitering."

“You wouldn’t have that problem if you didn’t hang around like a creep,” Casey answered, crossing her arms. “And it’s not like I _knew_ you would be here waiting. So why would I hurry back?”

Even though he made a habit of showing up, and she’d come to expect it, they never actually acknowledged or planned for it, so she was perfectly within her rights to call him out on it.

Derek rolled his eyes - she obviously _knew_ he'd _be_ there! He scoffed. "A _creep_. If anything, I add to the curb appeal." He looked disgustedly up at the ugly dorm building looming behind him. "Wait a minute," he said suddenly, whipping back to face her, like he had just uncovered something _huge_. "Are you saying that _if_ you knew I would be here, you _would_ hurry back?" He placed his hand over his heart. "How touching."

“What?! No!” Casey quickly denied, eyes growing wide. She inwardly cursed herself for getting caught. “Why would I?” she added, tilting her chin up in defiance. “If anything, I would have taken even _more_ time. Then if you got arrested you wouldn’t be here to bother me.”

Derek wasn't dumb enough to buy that laughably transparent deflection. He knew if he were to suddenly stop showing up, it would bother her. It would probably drive her insane, actually. He had considered doing it, just to draw attention to the fact, and see how long it took for her to swallow her pride and confront him about it (at which point he could tease her about _wanting_ to spend time with him). But he couldn't bring himself to disappear on her - again. Even though it was his life's mission to torture her and play with her feelings, he couldn't _torture_ her and _play with her feelings_.

Not like that. Not now that they were starting to _get somewhere_.

Anyway, it would probably be torture for him too, and ultimately, he couldn't stay away (he knew that much).

"And here _I_ thought we were becoming such great friends." He said sarcastically, though the statement was technically true. He was pretty sure he was her best friend at this point, and she was definitely his. But they weren't at the point of acknowledging that out loud yet, at least not unironically.

“Friends with _you_?” Casey slipped on an easy smile, feeling more comfortable with the casual banter. “You’re more like that sticky gum under my shoe I can’t completely scrape off.”

"Fine." Derek sighed dramatically. "I see how it is." He started backing away, and he noticed Casey's eyes widening at the movement. "I didn't know I was cramping your style." The further he retreated, the more panic he saw in her eyes and he had to stifle his amusement at her obvious internal turmoil. With another heavy sigh, he turned to leave. "Guess I'll see you over Christmas break, _sis_."

He cast one knowing glance over his shoulder, letting his smirk be known as he dared her to give in and expose that she really wanted him to stay. He knew he had the upper hand because he had cultivated a reputation for being the kind of guy who followed through on his bluffs - and Casey knew that.

In the unlikely event he _did_ have to follow through and leave, he could always come back and try again tomorrow. It was a marathon, not a sprint.

After a few steps, he swallowed a sinking feeling that she really _would_ let him leave.

“Hey!” Casey finally screeched. “I’m not your sister!”

_Dammit_ , she thought. Damn this stupid boy who could see right through her, and damn her stupid feet stomping on the ground as she caught up to him.

Thankfully, she got her voice under control. Sort of. “You just wasted my precious time,” she said, planting herself in front of him with menacingly narrowed eyes. “And you think you can just walk off without explaining yourself?”

" _Me_. Wasting _your_ time." Derek scoffed in disbelief, unable to contain the smug smirk on his face at his victory. Her attempts at stalling and covering up the fact that she was clearly trying to keep him there were adorable. "This from the woman who just made me wait an _eternity_ before telling me my presence is _unwanted."_ His face ached from smiling, "You know... I'm hurt."

“Oh, what, because suddenly you have _feelings_?” Casey pouted dramatically. “Did I hurt poor wittle Dewek’s fuh-fuh-feelings?”

"Oh, I can have feelings," he assured, narrowing his eyes mysteriously as he cocked his head. "When it suits me. And they are most _definitely_ hurt right now. _Soooo_ hurt in fact…" he pondered, amping up the melodrama, "that I might stop showing up _altogether_!" His eyes settled on hers, lingering intensely. "That is - until you _admit it_."

Casey frowned as she leaned closer, drawn in by his dark gaze. “Admit what?”

"That you like me," he said casually. The shock that crossed her face was almost comical and he watched her flounder for a hot minute.

Before she could sputter out a response however, he chuckled, letting her off the hook. "I want to hear you admit that you _like_ when I show up unannounced. That you _like_ hanging out with me. Because I _know_ you do."

Recovering from her shock quickly, because there was no way he _knew_ , she shook her head. “No way!” she shot back, poking a finger into his chest. “I’m calling your bluff. You couldn’t stay away even if you _tried_.”

She was right. He probably couldn't help himself from swinging by to tease her and hang out with her. Who knew how long he would have to stay away to prove her wrong, or when he would have an excuse to be around her again - Christmas break was over a month away. And _he_ had thought the _30_ _minutes_ he waited were an eternity…

"You _know_ I'm not the type to turn down a challenge," Derek threatened dryly. "Even the super boring ones." He looked her up and down, scrutinizing her, and he could tell she was trying her hardest to hold her ground, faltering slightly under his studying eyes. "If I didn't _know_ any better, I'd think you were trying to get _rid_ of me, Case," he teased. "Well… if that's _reeeaally_ what you want…" he sighed, slowly pivoting on his heel.

She completely hated the way her heart started hammering when he pulled away from her. She hated even more that her hand grabbed his arm before she even realized what she was doing.

_Stupid stupid stupid!_

“Fine!” Casey yelled at his head before he had a chance to walk away. She shifted awkwardly before spitting reluctantly. “I guess you can stay.”

Derek's heart jumped into his throat as Casey grabbed his arm. It always took him off guard how much she actually affected him on a visceral level, when he was so intent on provoking reactions out of _her_. He quickly regained his composure though and turned back to face her, rolling his head back like he was fed up with the whole charade.

When he noticed Casey was still gripping his arm, he cocked his head, his eyes flickering down to her fingers before looking back up at her with a raised eyebrow. A deep blush filled her cheeks and she pulled her hand back.

"Nuh, uh, uh," he mocked, not giving her any time to recover. "Not until you confess that you _want_ me to stick around." He plastered on a smug grin.

At this point, even though he was just playing with her, and even though he already _knew_ she secretly liked spending time with him… he really needed to hear her _admit_ it, _out loud._

Because excuse _him_ if he was a little impatient after _years_ of pining.

Casey eyed his large grin with resentment. He usually _liked_ arguing with her over stupid things like that, and they would pretend that they didn’t want to spend time together while settling down for a movie in her dorm room.

It wasn’t like she ever actually kicked him out. She always let him stay. And she felt good knowing that they would never acknowledge it and she would never have to face her feelings for him and eventually be turned down and humiliated.

Why couldn’t he just keep pretending?

“Okay, maybe…” Her eyes drifted down to his chest, because she couldn’t stand the damn smug look on his face and the cute dimples on his cheeks. “Maybe I do.” She shrugged casually, hoping it wouldn't occur to him that she didn’t actually _say_ the words.

"You do… _what?_ " Derek taunted arrogantly.

_Goddammit_.

She knew she would have to say it, because there was no way she wanted to go back to the way things were last year. Biting her lip, Casey looked up through her eyelashes, deciding that if her choice was to give in or watch him leave, well…

“I want you to stay.”

Casey's words washed over Derek and he sighed pleasantly. "Ahh…" He reached out to hold her by the chin. "Now, was that so hard?" He pouted patronizingly, unable to mask his sheer elation as he shook her head back and forth.

“You have no idea,” Casey grumbled, and tore her chin out of his grip in order to walk towards the front door. “Come on, dumbass, it’s getting dark.”

Chuckling lightly, his breath condensing in the crisp air, Derek followed her inside. Her reluctant admission felt like another piece falling into place in his grand design to win her over. Now, all he wanted was to enjoy the night ahead, watch a movie, order pizza, do whatever - it was a good time no matter what they did. Their flirty conversations always kept things interesting as he tested the boundaries between them.

* * *

"We spent practically all _day_ yesterday studying." Derek complained, throwing a stress ball up into the air and catching it repeatedly.

The two of them were lounging on Casey’s bed. They didn’t have other options, since her room was more like a square box with only enough space for her single bed, her desk and a dresser, but it was cozy enough. She’d decorated the walls with paintings and string lights hanging from the ceiling above the bed, which gave the room a nice intimate glow.

Sitting up with a sigh, Derek tilted her laptop closed, provoking a sharp glare. "Let's do something _fun_." His eyes met hers mischievously.

Oh, no. Casey recognized that look on his face, and it always meant _trouble_. “I doubt we have the same definition of _fun_ ,” she snorted, crossing her arms as she intensified her glare his way.

He shook his head with a knowing smile, "You've been known to let loose every now and again." She rolled her eyes at him and he doubled down, throwing in as much teasing charm as possible to tempt her to the dark side. " _Come on_ ," he coaxed. "When was the last time you stepped out of that perfect little bubble of yours?"

Casey huffed, she hated when he did that. It was like his devious mind knew just what it took to appeal to her wild side - which wasn’t much nowadays, where he was concerned. Just one of those looks, the wicked smile, the playful tone of his voice, and she was throwing all caution to the wind. “You mean when was the last time you got me in trouble?”

He laughed a little too proudly at that. "It's not like I'm leading you down a life of _crime,_ Princess," he teased. She liked to act all prim and proper, but he knew she had the same fire as him, she just didn't let it out as much. He suspected she _enjoyed_ the trouble, just a little, though she would never admit that. "What's the point of _living_ if there's no risk involved anyway?"

“You say that,” Casey started, raising her chin up in defiance, “but you defy authority _one_ time, then it’s _twice_ , and before you know it, you’re a criminal!” She shifted under his unimpressed stare, then got up to pace the room so she could avoid his beady eyes. “Anyways, your kind of fun always involves sneaking out or getting drunk or-” Casey stopped herself short of saying _having sex_ , blushing before she continued. “You know. And I am not taking part in any of your debauchery!”

Derek grinned at the veiled suggestion behind ' _you know'_.

"First of all!" he announced, rising from the bed to meet her stance head-on. "The only thing that could make me even sexier is if I was a criminal." His voice dripped with cockiness. "Second of all, we're adults. No parents. No one to tell us what to do. We can _'sneak around'_ as much as we want and there's nothing anyone can do to stop us!"

Casey squeaked as her brain conjured images of _sneaking around_ with Derek. “Wha-” she barely uttered before he interrupted her.

"And _third_ of all." He paused for a second, and looked around the room. Her tiny dorm was so neatly organized (except for whatever mess he had created). She _had_ to have a stash of alcohol _somewhere_. She wasn't a _saint_! But of course she would hide it somewhere like a shameful secret rather than display it proudly like any other university student.

_Where_ though? What sort of hiding place would she come up with in that Keener brain of hers?

He suddenly started rifling through her things, much to Casey's alarm. “Der-ek!”

There wasn't much storage space, and it wasn't in her closet, which was _way_ too organized to be humanly possible. It wasn't in any of her equally tidy dresser drawers, either.

“Um, _what_ are you doing?!” Casey screeched as he casually rummaged through her underwear drawer, like nothing was amiss. She was, understandably, livid.

In response to her protests, Derek flung one of Casey’s thongs at her face, which she angrily swatted away with a huff. He dropped to the floor unceremoniously to search under her bed. There was a surprising amount of stuff under there. Maybe that was the key to Casey's cleanliness, she just swept everything under there, out of sight, out of mind.

He shoved aside an ugly stuffed animal with a disgusted groan - recognizing it as the lame present Max got for her birthday when she was in the hospital.

“You know,” Casey continued stiffly, watching as Derek shuffled through her most shameful items, “there’s really nothing interesting for you under there.”

He tuned her out - he was on a mission. Among the mess was also a dusty photograph, a pair of shoes, the old cell phone he got her in exchange for her silence on his illicit merchandising scheme, and his old orangutan shirt.

_That's_ where it went! He had been looking for it. It was one of his favourites simply because of that one time Casey wore it to school. He figured it was where it was supposed to be and placed it aside as he continued his search, stretching his arm blindly into the depths.

His hand gripped an item tangled in fabric; it was big, hard, and shaped like… "A-hah!" he exclaimed triumphantly, pulling it out. He freed it from the article of clothing to reveal its true nature.

_Tequila!_

Casey’s eyes grew wide, torn between acknowledging the tightness in her chest when he discarded her cardigan so carelessly in favour of the bottle, and the horror that accompanied Derek’s discovery.

“No!” she said, picking up the cardigan and hugging it to her chest. She knew if she tried to grab the bottle, it would be a losing battle. “We are not drinking that!”

"Why the hell not?" he asked incredulously, admiring the bottle like a trophy. "And _why_ were you hiding it under your bed like it's the prohibition or something? Drinking age is 19, babe."

Closing her eyes and counting to ten, Casey took a deep breath before regarding her step-brother with the most stern look she could muster. Not easily done while holding onto a knit article of clothing like it was her childhood security blanket. Absentmindedly, she folded it neatly and dropped it on the back of her desk chair. “Emily got it for me over March break,” she said, like that statement explained everything.

"Tequila from _Mexico_?" Derek enthused. That was the perfect plan to let loose for the night. "We _have_ to drink it, you can't just let it go to waste!" He twisted the cap off and took a shot straight from the bottle in defiance. It _burned_ , in the best way. He shook his head at the strong kick and flipped his hair out of his face. "Whew!" he coughed, satisfied.

“It wasn’t going to waste, you insensitive jerk!” Casey practically yelled, outraged, as she pried the bottle from his hand. “I was waiting until Emily came back to open it with her.”

"Oops!" Derek chuckled, only apologetic at the bare minimum. "Well…" he sighed, "it's too late now! Seal's broken. We might as well _indulge_." He wiggled his eyebrows at her.

Pouting, Casey considered the opened bottle in her hand. Leave it to Derek to ruin her plans to have her first _ever_ drink with her best friend. But then again, Emily moving to Australia with her family had kind of put a snag in that plan to begin with. Nobody knew when she’d come back.

Casey’s eyes shifted to Derek again, and she abandoned her resolve begrudgingly, raising her eyebrows back at him as she raised the tequila to her lips and took a sip.

She choked on the burning liquid as she swallowed, covering her mouth with her hand so she didn’t spit it back in his face, even though he would totally deserve it for being such an ass.

When she was sure nothing had spilled, she pushed the bottle back into his hand. “That was _disgusting_!”

"Hah!" Derek laughed in her face. " _What_?" he mocked playfully. "Never had tequila before?"

“Why would I?”

That surprised him actually. Since it was Casey's first time drinking tequila, Derek suddenly wished they had some salt and lime. He did his best not to let his mind wander to _body shots._

"Because you made it through your first year of university?" he argued, like it was obvious. _His_ first year was like a never-ending party. Excessive binge drinking was a major aspect of school culture. "Even though you're a total Keener, you probably partied at _some_ point."

“Just because I’m at university and go to parties doesn’t mean I have to become a cliché, Derek!” Casey sighed and sat dejectedly on her bed. “You having _fun_ yet?”

"Tequila isn't _cliché_ ," he defended. "It's a rite of passage!" He let out a sigh. "Fine." At a certain point, he knew he wouldn't be able to get past Casey's stubborn nature, and if she didn't want to drink then he wasn't going to force her. "If you _don't_ want me to give you the full university experience, we can just _go out_ or something."

Derek’s lack of insistence baffled Casey, and she felt like contradicting him, just on principle. “What were we even going to do with a full bottle of tequila? Just take turns? _That_ sounds boring.”

"Of _course_ not." Derek rolled his eyes. "Who do you think I _am?_ We turn it into a _game._ " He hoped that word would spark the same amount of intrigue for her as it did for him.

Casey knew she should say no. Playing a drinking game with Derek was a recipe for disaster. So, obviously, what she said was: “What kind of game?”

Derek stroked his chin, as if deep in thought. There were so many options. It was a real opportunity - the right game could potentially further his plans of getting closer to her. Something… flirty. Something that brought those repressed feelings to the surface. "How about…" he pondered, before his lips turned into a wicked grin. "Truth… or drink?"

There could only be one reason for Derek to suggest something like this: he wanted ammunition to hold against her.

This was a bad, bad, _bad_ idea!

“Okay,” Casey said, regarding him like she was bored while she adjusted herself on her bed. “Since you’re holding the bottle, _you_ answer first,” she stated, then picked at a strand of lint on her comforter. She was still somewhat bitter from the admission he’d forced out of her, so she was eager to turn the tables on him. “Why do you keep coming over?”

"Pfft! You could have at least given me a _hard_ one." Derek rolled his eyes, lazily making his way to plop down next to her on the bed, bottle in hand. Might as well get _comfortable_ if they were doing this. "Same reason I do anything," he answered dismissively. "'Cuz I want to."

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Why would you _want_ to hang out with me?”

Derek tutted disapprovingly. "Not so fast, Case. You already _asked_ your question. You only get one. Gotta use it wisely." He stared her down intently. " _My turn_."

“ _Fine_ ,” Casey huffed, rolling her eyes in irritation.

Derek considered his words carefully. He needed to take his own advice and make the best of his questions. First of all, a warm up question, but nothing _too_ easy. "What would you say are my top ten _best_ qualities _?_ " he grinned with unrivaled arrogance. Her jaw dropped and he could tell she was about to protest. "Fine! Top three. Might be hard to narrow it down though.”

“Wh-a…” Casey sputtered, agape. “Are you _trying_ to get me shifaced? You have no good qualities, nevermind _best_.”

"The game doesn't _work_ if you _lie,_ " Derek challenged with amusement. "Come on!" He pushed her shoulder playfully and then sat back, his arms outstretched with pride. "I demand compliments!" He tilted the bottle back and forth to indicate her _alternative._

“Ugh, only you would use a game to stroke your own ego,” Casey muttered glumly. She considered the bottle in Derek’s hand for half a second, wondering if it might just be easier to drink it away. Thinking of Derek’s best qualities could lead her mind to bad bad places. Rolling her eyes at herself, and Derek’s wide, childish grin, she went for the first, least revealing thing she could think of. “I guess you actually are pretty good at hockey,” she crossed her arms defensively at his vaguely smug look, and added, “as far as I can tell.”

_One down, two to go_. The thing was, of course she _knew_ he had great qualities, she was much too aware of them, and he would never let her forget either. Every day, she witnessed his sheer display of wit and confidence, which, while annoying, was also part of his charm. Though she wouldn’t be caught dead calling him charming to his face, it all came down to how he could easily appeal to any person. “One might also call you charismatic,” Casey shrugged, adding a defiant tilt to her chin she didn’t really feel. “If only you would use it for _good_ instead of _evil_.”

He grinned, the arrogant bastard, obviously pleased by the compliments and either purposely overlooking the negative spin she added to them, or seeing right through them. He never took his eyes away from hers either, effectively keeping her gaze locked on his. It was unnerving, because not only did he see through her veiled compliments, it was like he saw right through _her_ , and that just couldn’t be any good. He shouldn’t have to know that she found all of his quirks endearing, that she was proud of his drive and determination, or that she felt like she could trust him.

Feeling the heat rising to her face, Casey looked away. “Marti,” she said, frowning at herself when her voice wavered curiously. “It’s… sweet the way you care about her. You’re at your best when you’re around her.”

The sincerity stunned Derek for a second. He had been expecting something at least moderately evasive as she hid her compliments under a blanket of sarcasm. He swallowed shyly as she watched him from behind her eyelashes. The energy shifted between them at the honest answer and Derek suddenly realized the vulnerable position they were putting themselves in. Everything was _subtextual_ between them, and the _truth_ part of Truth or Drink… and the _drink_ part too in all likelihood, threatened to spill all the contents onto the page.

But that was the _whole point_ , Derek reminded himself - to get out of the phase where they were just dancing around the issue and actually _do_ something about it for a change. He just hadn't realized how much _he_ would have to open up to do so…

"Yeah…" he cleared his throat, tempted to take a swig of tequila unprompted, just to give himself something to do. "I miss that munchkin."

Casey caught herself staring, halfway through what was probably the dumbest smile on her face. She mirrored him, clearing her throat. “Well, it’s my turn now,” she offered as a way to break through the thick tension that now surrounded them, then blurted the question that was burning on her tongue. “Why would you _want_ to hang out with me now? You avoided me all last year.”

It was only when the silence stretched on that Casey realized her mistake. Pointing out his absence from her first year was calling attention to the fact that she’d _noticed_ , and he could easily guess that she was _bothered_ by it. She really was, though, and she’d barely kept the accusation out of her voice.

She wasn’t quite ready to admit that she was _hurt_ that he’d avoided and ignored her that year. _Hurt_ seemed like a strong word, considering she hadn’t tried much harder to spend time with him - but he had made it clear he wanted nothing to do with her. It stung, because she’d expected things to be different. In her mind, they could have been like _this_ , the way they were right now, from the very start.

Close.

Friends?

Defining her relationship with Derek had never been easy, as if this whole time they’d been crossing out the options, coming to the right one by eliminating what didn’t fit. They had quickly removed _siblings_ from that list - first one to go, no way in hell. They’d tried enemies on for size, and it _seemed_ like it was working… except it just wouldn’t _stick_ , no matter how much they tried to hold on to it. Then they went back to _same difference_ , or rather _she_ went back to it because she wasn’t ready to move down the list yet. Not then. Which probably caused them to drift towards strangers for a year - she couldn’t help but wonder if it was really _her_ fault in the end.

But now...

Now, they were back on track - they _were_ friends, weren’t they?

(The harder she tried to make it fit, the more obvious it was that it _didn’t_ \- she kept needing new, bigger drawers.)

The doubt was what caused her to freeze like she’d been caught doing something wrong. By asking about the _why_ , they were getting closer to the _what_ , and if they _weren’t_ friends - what were they?

The tension between them intensified as Derek wracked his brain for how to answer. There were lots of reasons he could go with and remain truthful, but he had to pick the _right_ truth. He was pretty sure the moment didn't call for him to blurt out ' _well Casey, you see, it's because I'm hopelessly fucking in love with you and I thought that if I avoided you it would just go away. But it didn't, so finally I said screw it, and here we are._ '

Realizing he had to gather some courage to give her any _real_ answers, Derek took a swig of tequila. He watched her face crumble in response, probably thinking he decided to opt out of answering. " _Because…"_ he choked out through the burn. "Last year… sucked. It had its moments, don't get me wrong - the parties were something else. But overall a real shitstain of a year."

A knot turned in his stomach to think back on it. He was more miserable than he let on to anyone. In his attempts to avoid Casey, he just spiraled into a pit of self loathing, spending every waking hour hanging out with his douchey superficial friends, getting blackout drunk, and hooking up with random chicks to try and take his mind off of things. It felt so forced, like he was punishing himself, just pining away from afar.

"Then over the summer I realized how much I missed…" he trailed off, watching her eyes grow wide. He couldn't say he _missed_ her, could he? "... _This_ ," he settled on the more appropriate answer, then added, "teasing you is still my favourite hobby." It was honest even if it was a gross understatement.

After his school year from hell, he _dreaded_ being forced into the same space as her again for the summer - if she was consuming his every waking thought from across campus, how was he supposed to survive being in the next room? Even if he had done it before, it was getting impossible to manage. But it had the opposite effect, almost overnight. He couldn't help but be completely consumed by her, constantly involving himself with her. He was back to his old self, no longer drowning in self pity; if anything, high on life every time they ran into each other in the hallway. He felt _alive_ again. That was when he realized it would be impossible to try and stay away, and that his feelings weren't going anywhere. So really, he had no other choice but to go for it.

He handed her the bottle so he wouldn't start chugging it.

She took it gingerly, feeling as though he was passing on something else along with the bottle. Pulling it in her lap, she ran her fingertip along the rim thoughtfully. “Last year sucked for me too,” she said, shrugging shyly. “It was… lonely.”

"Yeah, well…" Derek murmured, finding it hard to imagine that being apart was as bad for her as it was for him - he hit a real low point. "Guess it's a good thing I'm here now to torment you on the daily then." He smirked proudly, hoping to lighten the mood, sensing there was more to be said on the subject but really not wanting to delve any deeper into it.

Casey snorted and rolled her eyes, but she couldn’t keep the smile off her face. “Okay, funny boy,” she pushed at his shoulder playfully. “Do your worst.”

"If you insist," he threatened with a wicked grin. He leaned forward challengingly. "What was the most embarrassing moment of your life?"

She really should have expected this question, because Derek lived for this stuff. But as she replayed all her most embarrassing moments - the ones he didn’t know of - she felt her eyes grow wide. There was no way she could give him that ammunition.

She took a swig of tequila and grimaced at the bitter taste of it. “Yeeurgh.”

Laughing at her discomfort, Derek nodded in approval. They had to get the ball rolling somehow. "Okay, shoot."

Narrowing her eyes, Casey leaned forward with a threatening glare. “How many times have you been _dumped_?”

Derek winced. "Oof."

That number was way higher than he was proud of. And the question reminded him of the year before. He tried the girlfriend thing a few times in the vain hope it might distract himself from Casey. But obviously that didn’t work out and he ended up cheating on them all, several times. He didn't even try to hide it. He felt bad about it now but at the time he was too self sabotaging to give a shit. Which was probably why he was dumped, at least five times in just one school year.

He reluctantly grabbed the bottle from her and took a large gulp, and then another, fighting to keep it down.

Casey thought this was absolutely hilarious, obviously, and laughed derisively at him, making up a little teasing dance as she sing-songed, “du-umped, you were du-uuumped!”

Derek rolled his eyes. While it was a sore subject he couldn't help but be cheered up by her dumb little bouncy dance thing and he had to fight off a smile. "Yeah, yeah," he droned, shoving the bottle towards her. "Take this. You're gonna _need_ it," he threatened devilishly.

“I hear bark,” Casey said, lifting an eyebrow as she took the bottle confidently. “I don’t see _bite_.”

"Okay," he said smugly, accepting her challenge and asked her a question she would _have_ to pass on. "What is the question you're most worried I'll ask?"

Casey stared, scoffing in offence. “That’s not fair! Make up your own questions!”

"Truth or drink Case, what's it gonna be?" Derek insisted, not bending in the slightest.

There really were too many dangerous questions for Casey to pick just one. And _telling_ him would be giving him _ideas_ , which - hell no.

“You suck,” Casey said disgustedly, scrunching her face up as she sipped on the alcohol. While it burned down her throat, she was starting to feel the heat spread over her face, different than her usual blush. “Ugh, still gross.”

"Wise choice," Derek said smoothly and then raised an eyebrow at her invitingly as if to say _bring it on_.

They carried on like that for several more rounds, both starting to feel the effect of the alcohol more and more, loosening their tongues in the process.

At first they only asked questions in order to embarrass each other, and the prospect of making a fool of themselves in front of the other was less attractive than the clear liquid in the bottle they were passing along. Maybe they were trying to build up the courage to ask the questions they really wanted to ask, while still maintaining plausible deniability.

As it went on, the questions became more and more personal, without them even noticing.

“Why…” Casey drifted off, frowning as the question came to her randomly, having never occurred to her before. “Why didn’t you go to Spain? With your mom?” The heat on her cheeks was intense, her lips were numb, but she felt _good_ \- light. “Was it because Marti wouldn’t speak to you?”

Crinkling his nose in thought, Derek let about a whoosh of air. "I mean, yeah. That was a determ- deterrent, sure. I guess I figured I didn't wanna leave my whole life behind. I had a sweet setup." He laughed lightly. "And I couldn't exactly leave _you_ behind. You know, 'cuz I would come back and you would have gotten too comfortable in my _absence_ \- prolly rearranged everything, dubbed yourself queen o' the castle and whatnot. Couldn't give you that advantage.” He was sober enough to realize he was rambling a bit, but too drunk to care. “Plus, you'd miss me too much."

She would. She _would_ have missed him.

As the warmth spread from her cheeks and down her neck, Casey felt her edges soften - those sharp and raw parts of her that rose up in his presence, like a protective barrier, which only his words could soothe down. When he said things like that - how he couldn’t leave her behind, she knew his language well enough to know what it truly meant. It was _their_ language.

Derek cocked his head as Casey stared at him with a dumb smile on her face. " _What_?" he teased, inadvertently leaning closer.

“Is that your question?”

"Smart mouth." He smirked approvingly. "Why didn't _you_ go to New York?" he asked, poking her knee and keeping his finger there as he studied her.

“Same reason,” Casey said, looking down at his finger when she felt the jolt that always accompanied his touch. “I mean, my whole life is here. And the fam,” she continued to stare at where their bodies connected, as if she could see the ripples of energy between them. “Plus, I knew you couldn’t survive college without me” She turned a triumphant smile his way. “And I was right.”

" _Apparently_ ," he conceded. It wasn't something he would normally cop to, but for the sake of _honesty_ or whatever, he couldn't exactly claim to have done well without her, he had been a fucking mess. Not to mention his grades were a million times better this semester.

His tipsy body didn't feel like being upright anymore, so he slumped forward and rolled over to use her leg as a pillow, lounging ever so casually and playing it off as though he was entitled to invade her personal space for his own comfort rather than out of some sort of desire for closeness.

It felt so natural in the moment, Casey didn’t even think about it before dipping her fingers into his hair. “What even happened last year?” she asked, then narrowed her eyes at him. “Were you on drugs?!”

Derek closed his eyes and hummed as Casey's fingers caressed his scalp, sending pleasant tingles through his entire body. Then he pried one eye open, realizing he was supposed to say something. "That's _two_ questions," he grumbled.

Casey gasped, her fingers pausing by his ear. “Have you been doing drugs?!?!?!”

Derek groaned. Admittedly, he was a bit of a train-wreck the year before. It was mostly drinking, and weed at parties when offered. But that wasn't enough to keep him distracted, so when his _‘buddies’_ invited him to join in on the fun, Derek figured it wouldn't hurt to try cocaine… once. He hated it though, he felt totally paranoid and on edge the whole time, like his heart was beating out of his chest, and his friends ended up ditching him. He also tried mushrooms once with his only really _trusted_ friend at the time, and it was a weird but overall enjoyable experience, like he had epiphanies and shit in between his attacks of giggles. But he hadn't touched _any_ drugs since he went back home for the summer.

Either way, Casey would probably kill him if she found out.

He opened his mouth and pointed at it, indicating for her to pour some alcohol in.

“Der-ek!” Casey complained as she poured a small amount in his mouth, unable to help how _sexy_ she found the action. She wished it was chocolate syrup or whipped cream, so she could spread it over his face and lick it off. She frowned at herself at the thought. Was she _drunk_?

Derek gulped down the alcohol and then laughed, as the spillage ran down his cheeks from Casey's clumsiness. "Where did you learn to pour?" he mocked. "Wait. No. That's not my question, lemme think." He caught Casey’s eyes tracing the bead of alcohol rolling down his neck. The words came out before he could stop them. "Want a taste?" he teased, craning his neck in demonstration.

“Huh?” Casey uttered in shock when she realized she was staring and snapped her eyes back to his. _Could_ she… “Would you let me?” she whispered under her breath.

Staring up at her, Derek could feel the blaze in his own eyes. He sensed the desire buzzing between them like static, the air thick and fuzzy around them. "You didn't answer _my_ question," he said huskily, with every intention of baiting her and brightening the blush in her cheeks. He angled his jaw further, hoping that the taught skin of his neck, readily available to her would answer _her_ question.

Breathing heavily, Casey straightened herself quickly, catching herself before falling forward, deeply ashamed at how obvious she was being. He was just teasing her, and she was falling for it. Properly embarrassed for the first time, she pulled away suddenly, with only enough sense as to not knock him over the head as she leaped off the bed. She drank shakily, a big large gulp, feeling her eyes water at the burning down her throat.

“Why would you ask something like that?” she managed weakly, turning around to face him again.

Propping himself up, somewhat startled by her sudden departure, Derek shook his head. "’Cuz you were staring?"

The mortified blush that enveloped her was a little too extreme for his liking, it spelled out panic, like she was going to turn and run. The last thing he wanted was to lose all the progress he’d made with her.

"Forget it," he dismissed. "You're gonna pop a blood vessel. I'll give you a freebie - on the house." He sighed, knowingly stepping into dangerous territory. "Whatever you ask, I'll answer honestly."

It was a necessary gamble to keep her in the game. He hoped it would pay off and not completely destroy him. Depending on the question, he would possibly have to bend the rules on lying.

She eyed him warily, reluctant to continue playing considering the dangerous turn it was taking. But she couldn’t help but wonder how honest he was willing to get. If he offered to answer anything she asked, she couldn’t really pass it up, could she?

There were so many possibilities for her to have him open up about his emotions, about his mom, his secrets. In the end, she decided to be selfish. “When did you stop hating me?”

_That_ was her big question? _That_ was what she wanted to know above all else? Eyeing her carefully, Derek couldn't help but sigh tiredly. "I never _hated_ you, Casey."

“Of course you did,” Casey insisted haughtily, latching onto the argument to distract herself from her confusing emotions. “You rejected me from the moment we met. Pranked me. Humiliated me.”

Derek rolled his eyes. "See? _This_ is why I usually bend the truth. I give you honesty and you don't believe me anyway."

“ _You_ were the one who taught me to keep a lie realistic!” Casey continued to argue, for the sake of arguing. It was safer when they were fighting.

Derek wasn't about to explain how accurate that was; there was a fine line between love and hate. So, instead he rolled his eyes again. "You asked. I answered. If you want more intel, you'll have to wait for your turn again." He sat up and crossed his arms challengingly, getting a slight headrush in the process.

“Fine,” Casey huffed, shaking her head. She crossed her arms, mirroring him. “Go for it.”

Derek contemplated his words, his brain working overtime. He needed something that would open her up again. Nothing too embarrassing or forward. But something personal.

"Hmm…" he considered thoughtfully, his eyes softening over her as he leaned against the wall.

What he really wanted to know was whether she felt the same way - he _suspected_ she did, at least to some degree, but he couldn't know for sure. Regardless, it wasn't like he could ask her outright.

"Have you ever…" he trailed off, hearing the vulnerability in his voice. He steadied himself, appearing casual. "Been in love?"

Taken aback, Casey dropped her arms at her sides. Obviously, she wasn’t expecting that question. It was just so strange to hear from him, like the words didn’t belong on his tongue. It still made her heart flutter, though, like maybe she could get used to it.

“I- I don’t,” Casey hesitated. _Had_ she been in love? She knew she had been infatuated. Max, Sam, even Truman. But _love_? For all her talk of romance and fairytales, she had no idea what it _felt_ like. And she wasn’t anywhere close to ready to look at what her feelings for Derek _meant_. So, truthfully, she didn’t have an answer. She figured, to be fair, that she should drink instead. She met his eyes over the rim of the bottle. He nodded, like he understood, but there was something else she couldn’t read, like sadness. Did he pity her? She wiped her mouth and asked, “you?”

Derek considered drinking in response, just like her. He didn't want to be the only one admitting to things. But there was no point. "Yeah," he answered resolutely, his voice gravelly, and quickly moved on to ask his next question. "Did you drink 'cuz you don't know, or 'cuz you don't wanna say?"

“I don’t know,” she clarified, clutching the bottle in both hands, suddenly feeling small. _Derek_ had been in love. She hesitated before asking her next question, because she felt silly asking. She _should_ know. “What’s it like?”

Derek was silent for a really long time. When he looked away from her, evading her gaze, she dropped her own to her feet, shaking her head. “You don’t… have to answer that.”

"It's…" He forced himself to look at her, analyzing the pull he felt between them. How was he supposed to put it into words? "Intense. Like… like you’re drawn to someone so much it hurts to stay away," he explained matter-of-factly, as if this was a perfectly ordinary conversation. "Like your lungs are being crushed.” He sighed and took a deep breath before continuing, needing some relief from that suffocating sensation. “You can't stop thinking about them when they're not around. And when they are? It's… I dunno. It's like… like a spark could set the whole room on fire or something." Honestly, he surprised himself - he was more poetic than he ever gave himself credit for, but he was only speaking from experience.

Casey took a moment to absorb his words, nodding vaguely as she tried to wrap her mind around his passionate description. She never expected that level of emotional depth coming from him, yet she sensed it was true, that he had felt it with every fibre of his being. She chewed on her bottom lip as she reflected on the fact that _intense_ didn’t even begin to describe how she felt about him. She felt the crushing in her rib cage constantly, and she could practically hear the fire crackling in the silence.

"So, _have_ you ever felt something… _intense_ like that for someone?" Derek asked, fishing for _something_ \- _any_ kind of indication.

There was something stuck in Casey's throat, she couldn’t _breathe_. Her voice came out weak and strangled. “I think so.”

It felt like confirmation to Derek. He released a breath of air and let the moment simmer for a minute before slowly shifting to sit on the edge of the bed. The corners of his lips curled up lightly, his eyes still locked with hers. "Your turn."

She looked at his small smile - soft, inviting lips she longed to touch. “Who…” she hesitated. Part of her knew she shouldn’t ask, because his answer would probably break her heart. But the curiosity was so great she was practically trembling from it. “Who was she? The- the girl you were…” She couldn’t finish the sentence.

Rising from the bed, Derek sauntered over to her carefully, like she was a small timid creature in the woods he didn't want to spook. Then, he was in her space, looming over her, holding her gaze while her wide eyes peered up at him questioningly.

He smoothly took the bottle from her hands and took a swig - there wasn't much left.

Swallowing her curiosity, Casey nodded. The movement was so slow it felt like they were suddenly in slow motion. Whilst disappointed that he didn’t reveal the name of the person who had affected him so profoundly, she figured it was probably for the better. She just wished he wasn’t so close to her again. His proximity put her on edge, the heat radiating from him engulfed her in a warm embrace that seared her skin, the smell of alcohol on his breath tickled her nose. The overall effect was dizzying. And that was without factoring in the tequila rushing through her bloodstream.

Derek could tell that they were sharing something real, addressing things in the deep subtext. He wasn't sure if it was scaring her or exciting her, but he couldn't help but soak it in hungrily. His eyes traveled over her and he licked his lips, wanting more than anything to just pull her in and kiss her. She was so close and his willpower was starting to fail him - he could only hold off for so long and his patience was killing him.

There was no way she couldn't sense how much he wanted to rip her clothes off right now.

"My turn?" he asked, his voice thick with the lust he was failing to mask.

“Yeah,” she breathed.

"You don't _really_ see me as your _brother_ ," Derek accused, like he already knew the answer, "Do you."

If he knew what Casey was thinking right now, he wouldn’t even need to ask. Part of her hoped he was going to kiss her. He could sweep her off her feet, kiss her senseless, and she would let him. “No.”

The smug smirk on Derek's face was a cover for the sheer elation he felt at that confirmation. Because she _knew_ what he was getting at, right? She _had_ to. "Didn't think so."

“You’re _not_ my brother,” she confirmed, feeling the need to, for some reason. Maybe it was the irritating smirk that graced his pretty face. _Why was he so pretty?_

"And you're definitely not my sister." Derek agreed. Brothers and sisters didn't stand this close, staring at each other, brewing in sexual tension.

“What _am_ I?” Casey asked, biting her lip anxiously.

"You're Casey." Derek answered simply, with a shrug. There was really no other way to put it. She was impossible to categorize.

“I know _that_ ,” she said, rolling her eyes with pretend exasperation.

"If you _were_ my sister," Derek elaborated, knowing that he really _shouldn't_ be saying this, but… he couldn't help himself - blame the alcohol. "I would probably need extensive therapy for some of the _dreams_ I've had," he quipped, passing it off as some sort of joke. Which it was, but also wasn't.

Casey froze for a second, eyes wide, her breath knocked out of her. Then, she went with the only appropriate reaction.“Der-ek!” she screeched, pushing hard at his chest until he fell back on the bed, effectively breaking the thick tension.

Derek cackled wildly. That was pretty much the reaction he would have expected. " _What_?" he defended innocently. "I can't _control_ that kind of thing! And I’m a _guy_. You can’t just put a hot girl my age in the room next to mine and expect it not to cross my _mind!_ No matter _how_ much of a Keener she is."

“T-that’s… just…” Casey sputtered. Okay, so, Derek was a regular teenage boy - well, not _anymore_ , but... he had a point? Her mind reeled with everything that was _wrong_ in his statement. It was so, so wrong. “Oh my god.”

Unsure of what exactly was making him so bold, Derek found himself unable to diffuse the situation. Instead, he ran directly into the flames, knowing he was probably taking things way too far. "So it's _never_ crossed your mind? Not even _once_?" he asked skeptically. She still looked mortified, like there was no way in hell she would ever respond. "Consider that my official question, by the way," he added arrogantly.

Unsure of what to do in her state of distress, with the room starting to spin around her, Casey located the bottle of tequila in Derek’s hand and snatched it away, gulping down the last drop of alcohol.

"So, that's a yes,” Derek teased triumphantly. “At least once." Otherwise she would have _delighted_ in screaming _NO_ in his face.

Sweet, sweet victory!

“Shut up, idiot!” Casey snapped, brandishing the bottle in his face. “I need more alcohol.”

Pleased beyond measure, Derek grinned. "I'm sure if we walk far enough in one direction, we will eventually find a liquor store." He got up suddenly from the bed. "And a McDonald’s," he added with a cheeky wink. “I’m starving.”

* * *

“De-rek! Slow down!” Casey yelled, giggling as she ran after him down the barely lit street. He was easily a few feet ahead of her, and she couldn’t catch up with her high heels on. “We’re too drunk for this!” They hadn’t found a liquor store, but they did find a bar, which solved the alcohol problem, as well as the food problem, and they were now stumbling home.

Slowing down to a stop, Derek caught his breath. "You're right," he huffed, “I think we have to face the fact that your scarf is _long_ gone."

Casey had been using the scarf to drunkenly play with a stray cat they came across on their walk back from the bar when it suddenly took off into the night, scarf in tow. They always seemed to get into the wackiest situations.

As she finally reached Derek, Casey’s heel caught on the cobbled sidewalk and she slipped on a patch of ice, grabbing onto him in her desperate attempt to stay upright. She looked up at him, feeling a grin break across her face as she laughed. “I think you’re right. That means you have to give me yours.”

Derek blinked down at Casey, stunned for a moment at finding her so suddenly in his arms, beaming up at him. She wanted a scarf? She could have one. She could have all the scarves in the world.

"I'll do you one better," he smiled softly, steadying her. He shrugged off his leather jacket, making sure to keep one arm around her at all times, even if it made things a little awkward. He swung it over her shoulders and then gave her a serious look. "Consider it a _rental_. And you'd better not feed it to a cat."

The jacket wrapped over her like a warm blanket. How was it that this leather was soaked in all his body warmth like it wasn’t freezing outside?

Along with the coat came a whiff of Derek’s body spray and it was like all her senses were overwhelmed at the same time, caught between the sight of his bright smile, the sound of his voice, and the feeling of his shirt beneath her fingertips. Her gaze drifting to his mouth, she wondered if she could have a taste… if he would let her if she tried.

Swallowing down the lump in her throat, her attention went back to her exposed neck, bringing her fingers to touch the cool skin there. “But I’ll get a cold if I don’t cover my neck,” she whined like a bratty child. She wanted everything of his.

Eyes drifting to follow the movement of Casey’s fingers, Derek's dumb drunk brain wandered to all the ways he could warm her up. How terrible would it be if he just leaned in and brought his lips to the exposed skin next to the collar of his jacket? Probably pretty terrible, right? Like she would be totally appalled and freak out - and they were both drunk. It would probably ruin all the progress he had made with her. He cleared his throat, realizing he had been staring, reluctantly pulling his scarf from around his neck.

Better to protect that exposed skin and therefore his sanity.

He draped the scarf around her, and clung to the ends, keeping her close, "What else do you want, while we're at it, hmm? A kidney?"

“Why, do you have one to spare?” Casey giggled stupidly, bringing her hands up to touch the soft material of the scarf. “I’ll give you something of mine in exchange.”

Casey looked so good in _his_ clothes. The possessive parts of him, as well as the sentimental parts, were having a field day. "In exchange for my scarf, or my kidney?” he grinned, intrigued by the mischievous tone in her voice, a familiar thrill starting to build inside of him.

“An organ for an organ,” she stated, nodding, and frowned, closing her eyes when the movement sent her head spinning. She grabbed onto his shoulders to stabilize herself, looking up again to find their faces so close their lips would touch if she moved just a little. If she could own any part of him, she thought, she would certainly give her heart away. “Which one do you want?”

Derek fought the urge to make a crude joke since she was basically asking which part of her body he wanted to _own_. "Well I'm pretty sure I can live without my kidney," he quipped, anchoring her weight more as he quickly realized she was _quite_ drunk. He pushed her hair out of her face, thoughtfully. "Is it really all up for grabs? I get to take my pick? Hmm… I wonder what the going rate is for a heart on the black market…"

“Derrrr-ek!” Casey pried her eyes open, blinking against the suddenly too bright streetlight. “You can’t sell my heart!” She pouted at him. “If you take it, you keep it.”

Yeah she was _really_ drunk. Derek gawked at her in wonderment at the thought of her heart _belonging_ to him someday. He was so sappy, it was pathetic - and the alcohol didn't help.

"Alright, fine," he sighed, feigning reluctance, and then chuckled, "it's a deal." Given her usual hesitation to acknowledge the thing between them in the _slightest_ , it felt wrong to push the subject while she was so hammered. "It's a good thing I didn't pick one of _your_ kidneys. They've clearly been through some shit." He smirked down at her, his eyes roaming her face fondly. "Let's get you home, yeah?"

“No-ooo,” Casey shook her head decidedly. “Let’s get _you_ home.”

Derek let his head fall back with a roll of his eyes. She was so stubborn about every little thing. "Says the one who can barely stand on her own," he lectured. "Come on," he said, wrapping his arm around her side to support her as she walked.

Falling against his side with her head on his shoulder, she sighed, a strange feeling of belonging seeping through her. All she knew in the moment was that she didn’t want the night to end. “But your place is nicer.”

Derek stopped dead in his tracks and he had to stabilize Casey as she wobbled. "You… want to…"

So, she wasn't talking about dropping him off at home. She wanted to go back to his place _with_ him? Like, together?!

_Together_ together?

That's sure as hell what it _sounded_ like, but maybe he was just hearing what he wanted to hear. Or maybe it was some kind of accidental implication.

" _Yeah_ , it's _definitely_ time to call it a night." He shook his head, clearing the fog from his brain, as he started guiding her again. "Time for Spacey to go to bed. Her _own_ bed," he insisted.

Frowning in confusion, Casey let Derek steer her with his arm draped over her shoulders. A picture of them huddled in each other’s arms, keeping warm together, manifested itself at the back of her mind. But her bed wasn’t big enough to fit the both of them comfortably, he should know this. He was so dumb. “Your bed’s _bigger_ ,” Casey insisted.

Derek couldn't believe his own ears. In fact, he figured he _had_ to be misinterpreting her somehow.

There was just _no way_!

He threw out some bait, to double check. "My jacket, my scarf, my _kidney_ , and now my _bed_? At this rate, I won't have anything left. Tell me, if you're sleeping in my bed, where am _I_ supposed to sleep, huh?"

It was Casey’s turn to stop, the peaceful image she had conjured swiftly evaporating as it occurred to her that he didn’t plan to stay with her. She looked up again, craning her neck, because he just _had_ to be so tall. “You don’t want to sleep with me?”

Jaw dropped, Derek stammered, "W… I-" He stared at her, his eyes wide as saucers. She looked completely serious - drunk out of her mind, sure - but completely serious. Did she mean, like… literally, or did she mean…

What did she mean?!

He was speechless.

Taking in his silence, Casey grew a bit self-conscious. Did she say something wrong? She didn’t think she was asking for much. Was the idea of sharing a bed with her so horrible? God, she was terribly drunk and saying stupid things.

Embarrassed, she hid her face in her hands, away from his dumbfounded gaze.

“You don’t, do you?” she muttered, her voice muffled against her palms. “I’m so stupid.”

Derek stared at her in alarm.

This was _not_ going according to plan. He had expected it to take _eons_ of consistent bonding and prodding before she _ever_ admitted to having feelings for him. And yet there she was, putting it all out there. All it took was a little tequila for her defences to slip.

What if she didn't remember this tomorrow? Could he confront her about it and bring it out into the open again? He was pretty sure mortifying her wasn't the way to win her heart (he'd tried that already - a few times). Or worse, what if she _did_ remember and they were stuck with a huge mess on their hands!

Of course, when it came to _them_ , nothing could ever go according to _plan_.

"Casey, stop," he said softly as she hid her face, "look at me…"

She shook her head, sniffling. “I’m too embarrassed.”

"Hey…" he pleaded with her.

Not the _tears_!

When she still wouldn't look at him, he took her tightly into his arms, holding her against his chest.

Resting his chin on her head, he sighed deeply. "It's not that I don't… _want_ to. Okay?" He turned his head to rest his cheek down. "You're just…" He sighed again, running his hands over her back. "You're really drunk. I just want to make sure you get home safe."

“I’m not that drunk,” Casey lied uselessly. Her hands were now clutching at his shirt, her face pressed against his chest, and she could hear his heart beating. For some reason, letting go seemed so hard to do. “I just want you to stay.”

"Mmm…" he hummed appreciatively. "I don't want to give you a heart attack when you wake up next to me with no memory of this. If I get to keep your heart, I should probably take _care_ of it, don't ya think?"

Casey sighed pleasantly. She was all too aware of his power to hurt her, but his soft promise to keep it safe made her heart soar. Truly, deeply, that was all she wanted. Her grip tightened on his shirt, and she rubbed her face into it, inhaling his scent. “Will you stay until I fall asleep?”

"Of course, Princess," Derek murmured fondly into her hair. She was cute when she was needy, and he liked to feel needed.

Appeased, she let him walk her home and help her into bed. She fell asleep clinging to her resolve to remember tomorrow.

Derek took one last look at Casey sleeping peacefully on her side, snuggling up to his scarf, and sweetly kissed her forehead.

After quietly closing her door, Derek sighed deeply to himself as he leaned his head against the frame. If things had been different, if he hadn’t asked such teasing questions and gotten her so drunk… maybe the night would have turned out differently. For better or worse, he wasn’t sure.

It felt like they had gotten… somewhere, and he didn’t want to take that back. But standing alone in her hallway, he just didn’t want to go home. Maybe, if she had been sober, and wanted him to stay…

He really hoped he didn’t screw everything up tonight.

Steeling himself, he gathered the courage to go home and removed his forehead from the doorframe reluctantly. He noticed the whiteboard on her door, with ‘ _Casey’_ written in her signature loopy font, and smirked. He was always writing little messages on it, which she usually erased right away to put it back how she liked it.

Finally, he left, but not before adding a new little note for her to find in the morning.

* * *

The next day, Derek waited for Casey after class, like usual, wondering if she would even show up, and what he should expect if she did.

She came up to her building, rubbing her sleepy eyes with her hand as she stifled a yawn. She stopped dead in her tracks when she spotted him, her hand automatically going to the scarf she was still wearing. He’d taken his jacket back, but she woke up wound up in his scarf with blurred memories from the night before and a note on her whiteboard.

_I had to repossess my jacket but you can keep the scarf. My kidney + scarf is a steal for your heart anyway._

She remembered him saying something about selling her heart on the black market, which made her roll her eyes, but the words still made butterflies flutter in her chest, so she couldn’t get herself to erase it.

Upon spotting Casey in his scarf, Derek was filled with a small flame of hope. That was a good sign, right?

He smirked at her - a genuine smile with a protective coating of smug. He removed himself from the wall and sauntered over to her, stopping at a respectable distance.

Hands in his jacket pockets, Derek began carefully, "Nice scarf. Where'd you get it?"

She remembered him wrapping it around her neck, and she remembered the feeling of his arms around her. She also remembered asking him to stay until she fell asleep, but she remained unsure of the extent to which she embarrassed and exposed herself. Considering Derek’s smug expression, it was probably a lot. Yet he came back, that had to count for something.

“I’m surprised you don’t remember,” Casey said, stepping up to him at their normal distance, instead of the Victorian amount of space he’d left between them. “Since you offered it to me so generously.”

The taunting lilt in Casey's voice stoked the fire. Derek couldn't help the lopsided grin that found itself on his face. Running his tongue along the back of his teeth, he looked her up and down, stepping further into her personal space as he contemplated how he wanted to _play_ this.

"Oh, believe me. _I remember,_ " he said meaningfully, as if to say he remembered a _lot_ of things.

The question remained, how much did _she_ remember?

Casey deflated. Well, that was a pretty good sign that Derek had things to hold against her for the rest of her life if she’d ever seen one.

Trying to piece together the jumbled bits of conversation from last night, she had a feeling that she had crossed a line somehow. A line that possibly couldn't be uncrossed.

Feeling her face warming up, she resisted the urge to squirm under his intense look. Unsuccessful, she let her shoulders fall and bit her lip anxiously. “I said some really inappropriate things last night, didn’t I?”

He took pity on her and shrugged, as if it was no big deal, surprised she was even acknowledging it. Watching her squirm in the silence, he recognized she was in a tough position, and instead of exploiting her vulnerability, he figured he should keep the ball in his court - _for now_.

"You were drunk," he dismissed. "What you _said_ was actually…" Pausing, he thought back to how excited her words had truly made him feel. " _Interesting_ ," he settled on with a satisfied smirk.

She whined at length as she deflated, any small hope that he was going to give her an out annihilated. “I know you want to humiliate me for the rest of my life, but could we just forget about it? Just this once?” Her hand rested on his chest as she pleaded. “I just don’t want things to get _weird_ between us now that we’re finally getting along, and-and ruin everything just because I said some stupid shit!”

Derek was still in the process of rapidly switching tactics. His slow, deliberate approach was now a thing of the past since Casey accidentally revealed her cards. He wondered if he should give her this _one_ victory, and then start the whole process up again. On the other hand, maybe now that she had drunkenly shown her attraction to him, he was free to flirt with her more openly. Was he _really_ supposed to pretend like he didn't know she _wanted_ him?

Her touch radiated warmth through his core, and he brought his hand over hers to hold her there, bringing his face closer. He made sure to maintain his teasing tone of voice but he couldn't stop the genuine quality from coming through. "If you think I can just _forget_ that you wanted to _sleep_ with me, you're insane."

He watched the blood pool in her cheeks with fascination.

Casey’s face felt so warm she thought she was going to faint. That couldn’t be right, she tried to reassure herself through the absolute horror that filled her. She wouldn’t actually come onto him so directly, even while drunk… would she? Nevermind the fact that she _wanted_ to, that was beside the point. Surely she would never…

Eyes growing wide, she realized with renewed shame that she _had_ implied it - whilst having innocently invited herself to _sleep_ in his bed (with their clothes on!), the double meaning was too clear to misunderstand. It had slipped out of her drunk mouth without a second thought, and today she was paying the price.

"But…" Derek sighed reluctantly, releasing her from the torture written all over her face, "if you want to take it all back, I _guess_ we can pretend it didn't happen."

Worst case scenario, he could pick up where he left off. Even if he humoured her and pretended it never happened - they would both know it _did._ And that was still a _win_ in Derek's book.

The feeling of his hand on top of hers kept her grounded in the moment, keeping her from fluttering away with her heart. Maybe she was imagining it, but he seemed disappointed by the idea of pretending nothing happened. She couldn’t quite bring herself to entertain the thought that he wanted it too, because… he thought she wanted to have sex with him, and she had woken up alone, that could only mean that he wasn’t attracted to her, right?

“It’s not like you don’t have enough blackmail material against me already,” Casey said with a nervous laugh, trying to lighten things up. “I just couldn’t stand to have you laughing at me about _this_. I couldn’t-“ she shook her head self-consciously. “How are things supposed to be normal if I can’t even look at you?”

Derek's face fell. It was always so hard for him when she couldn't look at him. Eyes turning away shyly, he lived for that - but downright refusing to look at him? That was torture.

"Casey," he said seriously. "Do I _look_ like I'm laughing at you."

“Does that mean you _won’t_ make fun of me?” She asked hopefully, her smile turning sheepish.

Derek was fully prepared to give her the win this time. He could tell she was serious about feeling ashamed about the night before, which took the fun out of making fun of her for it. But he also didn't want to drop the issue entirely. Because he really wasn't _judging_ her for what she said, he just wanted to flirt with her about it.

"Where's the fun in that?" he asked lightly, his gaze still intense, a sly smirk building on his lips. "Can't I tease you, just a _little_ bit?" he coaxed hopefully. "How are things supposed to be _normal_ if I can't _tease_ you?" His fingers played idly with the fabric of his scarf around her neck.

She knew he was right, that the teasing and the banter was _their_ status quo. He was still talking to her, that was the only thing keeping her chest from fully crumbling in on itself. It was just so painful to imagine that everytime he would tease her, he would be reminding her that he didn’t want her.

Hand slipping from under his, she crossed her arms around her middle protectively. “And constantly reminding me of the most embarrassing rejection of my life is supposed to keep things normal?”

Derek’s eyebrows knit together in confusion. " _Rejection_?"

“Well, _obviously_ we didn’t…” Casey pointed out, incredulous that she had to remind him. It was really awkward to say out loud, and she had to look away as she felt her face warming up fiercely.

Dumbfounded, Derek shook his head. She was embarrassed because she thought he didn't _want_ her? God, she was clueless! "Yeah. Only because you were so drunk I almost had to _carry_ you, Casey. It wasn't a… _rejection_ ," he said with air quotes.

“I know you were trying to be nice about it,” Casey grumbled. “Just ‘cuz you turned me down gently doesn’t make it feel any less like a rejection.”

Derek sighed in frustration. Apparently his indirect approach had been completely useless this _whole time_ , since Casey was too deep in denial to ever believe he could have feelings for her. It wasn't even like he was ever _subtle_ , by any standard. So, he would have to take a risk and be even more direct, really _spell it out_ for her.

"Let me put it this way," he said, reaching out slowly to pull her closer by the elbow, testing her responsiveness. His voice turned low and suggestive. "If you had been _sober_ when you came on to me like that… the night would have ended _very_ differently." He eyed her intently, hoping he was drilling the image into her skull.

Casey’s heart burst. She let herself be pulled towards him, staring dumbly as she tried to wrap her mind around what he’d said. Surely, he was kidding. She could barely find her voice when she croaked, “what?”

He beamed at the absolute shock on her face. It was official - he broke her. "You heard me," he said smugly, playing with the scarf between his thumb and index finger.

“I-“ She drifted off, trying to catch the breath he’d knocked right out of her. Never in a _million years_ would she have expected him to want her that way. He really meant that? Her eyes softened, hypnotized by his, she couldn’t look away. “I really didn’t,” she breathed, taking a step closer without thinking.

"Well then, since there's _obviously_ something wrong with your _ears,_ " Derek teased, tucking a strand of her hair behind one of them delicately. "Maybe I need to _show_ you _._ " He smirked devilishly. "There's always _tonight_. We can… hang out like we usually do, and then… well, we'll see," he tacked on, his eyebrow quirking suggestively.

“Okay,” Casey said, containing within herself the thrill that arose at his words. Her eyes slipped to his mouth, and she practically shivered at the thought of feeling it on her, the now quite real possibility that she could touch him the way she wanted to. Licking her lips, she met his gaze again. “You wanna come in?”

Mirroring her, Derek licked his lips in response, and motioned with a nod of his head. "Okay," he said casually, enjoying the moment, excited for whatever was coming next.

* * *

“You wanna watch a movie, or…?” Casey said as she let herself and Derek into her dorm room. She secretly liked that he insisted on hanging out here instead of his place, because they didn’t have a choice but to huddle close when they watched a movie.

Tonight, of course, she wasn’t sure what distance was appropriate for… the other part of the plan. If there really _was_ going to be another part to it anyway. She shifted nervously as she dropped her keys on her desk and pulled the scarf from her neck. “I bought Inception on iTunes!”

Derek sauntered casually into Casey's dorm room and stripped off his jacket and shoes, like it was any other night. Since that was part of the deal, he was planning on playing that role to a tee, by acting like there _wasn't_ some big looming possibility over their heads. Since Casey was probably overthinking the crap out of what was happening, it had the potential to drive her nuts. And he would look for any opportunity to play with her.

"Yeah! Throw it on!" he said amicably, tossing himself to lounge on her bed lazily, making himself at home like he always did. "You got any snacks?"

Turning with her laptop in her hands, she paused to take in the sight of Derek… in her bed.

_Oh my god, Derek is in my bed!_

It wasn’t anything unusual. It basically happened daily, when they were either hanging out or studying - like last night. There really wasn’t anything different about it. She really shouldn’t have that reaction to him. But now, knowing that he _would_ have sex with her if he had the opportunity, the possibility loomed over her like a big dark cloud.

“Uh, yeah,” she finally answered, shaking herself. She brought the laptop over and put it down on the bed before returning to her desk drawer. “I’ve got some dried fruit and almonds!” She pulled the bags of delicious snacks and shook them happily in the air. “Wanna go wild and mix both?”

“Uegh!” Derek shuddered comically. “Pass. I’m not a woodland creature. You should really keep a stockpile of junk food for your _guests,_ you know _._ How many times have we run into this problem? I’ve lost count.”

Pouting, she let her arms fall at her sides. So much for converting him to healthy snacks. “These are good for you!” she insisted. “Plus, since I own your kidney, I’m entitled to nourish it however I see fit!”

“You may own _one_ of my kidneys,” Derek clarified. “But I still maintain ownership of my _stomach_.” He paused in consideration. “ _And_ my tongue. My taste buds would _not_ be pleased.”

“Well, these are the snacks available in _my_ room,” she decided, taking her spot on the bed with the dried fruits and almonds in her lap. “You can decide on the snacks when we’re in _your_ room.”

Smiling at the vague promise in Casey’s words, Derek sighed. “Fine.” He held out his hand. “Gimme one of them… pruney… things.”

_Yes!_ Casey cheered internally. She happily fished a prune out of the bag and presented it to him with an encouraging smile.

He popped it into his mouth, narrowing his eyes and smacking his lips thoughtfully at the taste. “Hmm…” he trailed off, then shrugged, “not bad!”

He swiftly snatched the bag from her lap, pulling it further out of reach when her instinct was to try and grab it back, from their long history of him stealing things from her.

“Hey!” she shouted, leaning over and practically crawling into his lap to try and snatch it back.

Evading her, Derek played keep-away. He reached into the bag and threw a piece up into the air, catching it in his mouth. He smirked triumphantly at her as he chewed it. It was the exact kind of playful moment he _lived_ for.

After making another grab for the bag, which he once again evaded, Casey huffed and sat back on her heels, blowing hair out of her forehead. “You didn’t even want them two seconds ago!” she complained.

“Don’t worry,” he reassured, holding the bag up between them. “We can _share_.” He gave the bag a little shake and wiggled his eyebrows, making it clear that there was a real chance of him yanking it away once she tried to reach for it.

_Ugh_ , Casey sighed disgustedly, why was he so damn cute when he was being annoying. Pursing her lips, she calculted her next move, knowing that if she wasn’t fast enough, he would be able to pull away. It wasn’t just dried fruit anymore. It was a matter of _pride_.

In a quick motion, she snatched the bag, surprised to find out that he let her have it without a fight. With it dangling between them uselessly, it occurred to her that the snacks were irrelevant. They would have fought over _anything_. She eyed him curiously, taking in his calm expression, the light smile at the corner of his mouth as he studied her just as intently.

“You’re fired, by the way,” Derek said suddenly.

“Huh?” Casey uttered, blinking at him quizzically. “Fired?”

“You had one job,” he teased, leaning in closely. She froze, and he pressed play on her laptop, since the movie was still paused at the beginning. He gave her a mocking look.

“I was taking care of your health first!” Casey defended, whispering for some reason now that the film started. She shifted to sit down comfortably with her back against the wall, and crossed her arms defensively, raising her chin up as she pointedly set her attention on the screen. Fine, then. He wanted to watch the movie, then she would _watch the movie_!

Derek settled in. A few minutes into the film, he was already noticing the tension between them, and how determinedly Casey kept her eyes glued to the action. He stretched out his leg, and it brushed up against her, causing her to tense up momentarily.

She relaxed after a minute, letting their legs rest next to each other. They were barely touching, but it still raised goosebumps on her skin. To distract herself, because it was just too early to just jump him right now (they should at least finish the movie!), she dug a dried banana out of her snack bag. She eyed Derek next to her carefully as she chewed, then decided to dig out a fruit to offer him.

Derek looked down at the little fruit held gingerly between Casey’s fingers, being so adorably offered to him. He plucked it from her graciously and tossed it in his mouth with a smile. As their gazes lingered, he stretched his arm around her shoulders, watching her eyes widen. He found the light switch on the wall and flicked it off, plunging them into darkness, the light from the laptop illuminating Casey’s blushing face. Then, he slowly brought his arm back between them.

He knew he was being a tease, but honestly, taking advantage of their new dynamic to make her hot and bothered was just too tempting.

Gosh, she was turning into a big ball of nerves, jumping at the slightest movement or touch. Part of her wondered if he was doing it on purpose, which - of course he was doing it on purpose! The pest.

Well, he didn’t get to have _all_ the fun. If bothering her and making her squirm was fair game, then she could do the same to him!

Keeping her eyes on the movie, without flinching, she shifted casually in her seat - just adjusting her position, really. It wasn’t her fault her bed was so small that their shoulders touched!

The light brush of Casey’s shoulder against his own caused Derek’s heart to shift into overdrive. It wasn’t so much the thought of touching her _shoulder_ that did it for him - it was more the fact that Casey was testing the boundaries, herself.

His turn.

After letting the tension grow between them for a few scenes, he angled himself toward her, slowly stretching over her to reach for a pillow on the other side of the bed, taking his sweet time.

“ _Paaardon_ me,” he said cheekily, as he brought the pillow back to cushion himself against the wall. He caught her eye roll and subtle glare - she knew _exactly_ what he was trying to do.

“You’re pardoned,” Casey said tightly, twisting her hair and pulling it to the opposite side. Getting a reaction out of her was what he _wanted_ , so she decided not to give him one, focusing back on the movie like it was _much_ more interesting than him and sighing dreamily. “Wow, Leo’s _stilllllll_ got it.”

Derek had to stifle a laugh at Casey’s feeble attempts to appear unaffected by him. He sucked air through his teeth unapologetically. “ _Sorry…_ " he taunted. "One last thing.”

He propped himself against the wall with the arm closest to her and then reached around her again, this time their faces came dangerously close, like they were about to kiss in the process. He heard her sharp intake of breath and he stretched further, his face passing hers, so that her nose was practically nuzzling the crook of his neck. He felt the puff of air by his ear as Casey let go of the breath she had been holding.

Feeling around blindly, he found the loose cord lining the shelf on the wall with his fingertips and plugged it in, brightening the room with glittering fairy lights.

Turning his face to hers, he slowly pulled back, staying intimately close to find the lights sparkling in her wide eyes like she was a Disney princess.

The closeness and the light shining above them brought Casey back to the night before, when she was in his arms and all she wanted was to kiss him. She was so screwed, because she would never be able to be indifferent to him. He was so close, she could just lean in…

Eyes flickering down to Casey’s slightly parted lips, Derek figured that all the drawn out, deliberate strategizing in the world couldn’t have created a better moment, so he went for it. Heart in his throat, he closed the distance, capturing her lips softly in his own.

Casey gasped at the touch of their lips, as surprising as it was anticipated. Her hand came up between them to touch his cheek, holding his face under her palm as she let herself drown in the kiss. Her back arched instinctively, pushing her body against him in order to take over every bit of his warmth.

It was really happening. He was finally _kissing Casey_ \- after _years_ of fantasizing about it. He pulled her close and savoured the milestone. It was so sweet, he wanted more. His tongue reached out to taste her as his heartbeat thrummed through his veins.

Sighing in delight, she allowed him into her mouth, the way she allowed him in her heart, and her soul. He kept her pressed up against him while her arms snaked around his neck to pull him _down_ with her as she gently lay on her back.

Derek hummed with approval, following her lead, and pressed her firmly down into the mattress, putting everything into the kiss that he had been holding back for so long. A rush of emotion flooded him at being able to express the parts of himself he had been forced to hide. With his hand cupping her cheek, he allowed himself a tender, unfiltered moment, stroking his thumb over her soft skin.

The way he touched her so delicately, the reverent slant of his lips over hers, she _felt_ it. She had _no idea_ how he felt about her before, she had been _way_ off the mark. Her heart skipped a beat at the thought.

He _liked_ her.

It was so obvious now. How he always showed up, looked out for her, all the glances she’d never been able to decipher.

This whole time, he liked her.

That realization ignited her passion anew, and she wanted to tell him, show him that she felt the same way. More than that, even, she was taken over by an onslaught of emotions, with this one kiss, she knew the whole truth.

Pouring all that emotion into the kiss, she pulled him in tighter, her arms forming a cage around him, her legs wrapping around his, and mouth pressing harder, harsher, angry kisses to his lips. He’d gone and done it. He had made her fall in love with him. Possibly long, long before now, she realized.

Something primal growled within Derek in response to Casey's ferocious attacks.

He couldn't let the intensity of his feelings scare him. It wasn't like they came as a shock. He had been in love with Casey for a long time. It was his urge to say it out loud in the moment that frightened him. It was also frustrating because he knew it was too early to say something like that - they were _just_ kissing for the first time (quite heatedly, mind you). But he couldn’t help but feel impatient; he had been waiting an _eternity_ to say it to her already.

To put a stop to his distracting thoughts, Derek put the focus back on the historical moment happening around him, intent on sucking the marrow out of it. He couldn't afford to get distracted while he was _touching_ her for the first, and possibly only time. His lips found the smooth, sensitive skin on her neck and he ran his tongue over her pulse, savouring her.

“Derek,” Casey, gasped, out of breath. She moaned at the feeling of his tongue licking up her throat, suckling on that perfectly soft spot just underneath her ear. Her fingers dug into his hair, his stupid fluffy hair that always looked so ridiculously dishevelled, wild on top of his head.

She moved her leg to ground herself as she angled her hips against his, seeking to get _closer_ , and kicked the laptop still playing the movie in the process. She barely registered it falling to the floor with a thump.

As their hips aligned, Derek groaned, thrusting against her on instinct. His mouth abandoned its task of bruising her neck and he pulled back, unable to stop himself from gawking at her. Did she say his name at some point, or did he imagine that? He couldn't tell due to the deafening sound of his blood pumping. Casey's swollen lower lip taunted him as she panted softly. As if in a trance, he brought his hand up to delicately trace the soft, plump texture in admiration.

“Der,” she whispered against the pad of his thumb, her eyes blinking shut. When his fingers were gone from her mouth, venturing down to wrap delicately around the side of her neck, she bit down on her lip. Her hands grasped at the hem of his shirt. “Will you stay tonight?”

Derek's eyes shot back up to her face, embarrassed at how completely entranced he had just been, watching himself touch her.

"It would be _impossible…_ " he answered huskily, pressing a reverent kiss to her jawbone, "to get me to leave."

Smiling as Derek’s breath tickled her ear, she moved her arms down to hook under his shoulders, and pressed a quick kiss to his collarbone, followed by a blunt bite. “As if I was _ever_ able to get rid of you before,” she teased, allowing her voice to translate how pleased she was to be stuck with him - that he wouldn’t leave her again.

Hissing as her teeth marked him, Derek grinned. "It's not like you tried that hard," he bantered. "You didn't want me gone in the first place." He shut up any possible reply with a kiss.

She couldn’t argue even if she tried. He knew her too well.

It translated in the way he kissed her, as if he could read the depths of her mind to learn just the way she liked it. It was a plethora of sweet, gentle kisses, followed by fierce, hungry ones that melted her insides.

She had never felt like this - unraveled, every piece of her exposed, but so _safe_. Like it was _okay_ to let it all show, and if any pieces fell out, he would put them back safely where they belonged. She’d never wanted or trusted anyone that way. For once, she was glad to have waited for the perfect moment, for nothing else would ever be this _right_. She loved him.

_She loved him_.

And she wanted to _show_ him.

The parts of her no one had seen before.

When their hips collided once more, she felt that undeniable ache, the _need_ , inside of her building up to greater heights. She had to pull back, gasping for air, and met his eyes again. She could barely see, her vision was unfocused and blurred, like she was drunk all over again. Her trembling fingers didn’t ask permission to move, slowly reaching down for the hem of his shirt and pulled.

Instinctually, Derek discarded his shirt in half a second. Their panting kisses caused his head to spin. His hand traveled under her sweater, spreading goosebumps over her hip. She shivered, raking her trembling fingers into his hair.

He had a sudden worry that the pace was starting to overwhelm her. After all, he was fairly certain she was relatively… inexperienced - though he wasn't sure exactly _how_ inexperienced.

Even with all _his_ experience, he found the intensity between them made him feel unhinged and intoxicated. He had never felt anything like it before.

So, he slowed down, dragging out each kiss and caressing her side lovingly.

Casey sighed, enjoying the way his mouth lingered on a soft kiss, while his fingers stroked her skin gently like it was delicate porcelain, the frenzied movements replaced by slow, lazy exploration. Now she could _breathe_. With each inhale, she breathed him in, stole the air out of his mouth, and absorbed the warmth from the skin of his back through her fingertips.

Every new feeling washed over her like waves, guiding the movements of her body as it arched against his with a roll of her hips, in delicious yet vain attempts to join together. A whine escaped her, conveying frustration at the lack of contact. She wanted to feel his chest against hers when they pressed together, their hearts beating in unison.

She pushed him away gently, just enough so she could sit somewhat upright and look directly into his eyes, asking, pleading, while she lifted her arms above her head.

Raising his eyebrows in surprise, Derek paused, slack-jawed, regarding her curiously. He really hadn't expected much removal of clothing tonight, even _with_ the weighted meaning behind _sleeping together._ He figured she had meant it more… literally - sleeping next to one another - the suggestive meaning reflecting a hidden desire more than an immediate goal. How far was this headed tonight, exactly? He was already kissing her _way_ ahead of schedule according to all his previous estimations - not that he was complaining in the slightest, he was just taken off guard.

Deciding not to question the greatest moment of his life, he went with the flow, slowly running his hands up her body and pulling up her sweater. His eyes never left hers, mesmerized by the anticipatory, seductive fire in them. Pulling the sweater over her head and breaking their eye contact, Derek's gaze roamed down her body, discovering the new areas of her skin available to him. Awestruck, he watched himself caress his hand along the underside of her bra.

When he looked back up, he saw the recognition in her eyes that she caught him checking her out - shy but proud, with a dark urgency behind her pupils.

He surged forward to renew their kiss and lowered himself against her, desperately needing to feel close to her - as much skin touching as possible. Everywhere they touched sparked tingling sensations exploding through his entire body.

It was exactly what Casey hoped it would be; Derek’s weight as he settled on top of her, pressing her down; the span of his chest covering hers; large, scorching hands burning up her sides until they found the swell of her breasts. She pressed up eagerly into his palms when he touched her, fondling, squeezing, the sheer pleasure it sparked extracting a low throaty moan from her.

The sound of encouragement from Casey's throat was the sexiest thing Derek had ever heard, and he was starting to get lost in his arousal, his brain turning to mush. He needed to explore every inch of Casey's body. His lips trailed down her neck and he placed a kiss between her breasts, eliciting an amazing gasp. He wondered what other sounds he could provoke from her, experimenting as he kissed down her body to find the most sensitive areas to bring attention to.

When he reached her stomach, he paused in surprise as something broke his concentration.

Since when did Casey have a-

Belly button piercing? A sparkly little bow.

It was so random and unexpected. And sexy, like a little wrapped present. His head fell against her as he laughed, his hair tickling her stomach.

“What’s so funny?” Casey rasped, the words breaking through the fog in her brain.

This made him chuckle again and he dropped a sweet kiss over her hip. "You really…" he said between breathy bursts of laughter, "surprise me sometimes is all." He fiddled with the charm to further his explanation.

She looked down at him, bewildered, and her breath caught. His joyful laughter accompanied a childlike smile that reached his eyes, so bright and genuine it caused the cutest dimples on his cheeks. The fairy lights reflected in his eyes, their dark depths stealing all the surrounding light, sparkling with life and mischief. He was so handsome.

And she was in _so_ much trouble.

Because when he looked at her like that, with so much admiration and desire apparent on his face, she was helpless against the feelings that overwhelmed her. She _wanted_ him so much. She wanted _him_. The goofy look on his face, the playfulness in his eyes, the ridiculous way he styled his hair. She wanted it all, so deeply, so fiercely that it burned her, and she didn’t know what to do with it.

She moved suddenly, unable to contain the urge to grab him and kiss him, pushing him back on his heels as she straddled his lap and hugged him to her, mouth firmly attached to his in a forceful attack. “You… are so…” she grumbled against his lips, unable to form a coherent sentence.

"Mmm!" Derek hummed against her lips in shock at the sudden onslaught. Once again, she took him completely by surprise. Firmly grasping her backside, he couldn't help but continue laughing in amusement between her aggressive kisses. "Ha… mmm… you gonna… mmph... finish that sentence?" he mocked.

Pulling back with a sharp breath, she found his mocking eyes and felt the heat in her cheeks intensify. “Annoying,” she said, following her statement with a renewed assault on his mouth, which curled into a self satisfied grin beneath hers. She wrapped herself around him, pushing all her weight forward and causing him to fall back into the mattress.

It was funny how a little insult could turn him on so much. There was probably something wrong with him for actually _liking_ when she insulted him (not that he planned on fixing that).

The way she straddled him - with such stubbornness and determination - was just so… Casey. She flipped her hair out of her face and over her shoulder. Cradling the back of her head, Derek pulled her close, bringing his lips to her newly exposed neck.

He spoke low in her ear, deliberate in his attempt at tickling her with his breath. "And _you_ are so…" he trailed off, kissing her earlobe. She shivered. " _Beautiful._ "

The word ghosted against the shell of her ear and swept over her, encasing her in a warm glow. Sighing contentedly, Casey placed a soft kiss to the side of his neck, before looking up at him. One hand came up to caress his cheek tenderly as she observed his expression, finding him staring back with the same emotions he’d showered her with this whole time; adoration, wonder, passion. He made her feel so good with a single touch, and desired with a single word. More than anything, now, she wanted him to feel the same.

After pressing her mouth to his once more in a chaste, thankful kiss, she moved on to pepper gentle kisses over his face, his cheek, his jaw, and down his neck, sucking at the welcoming skin at his clavicle. His hand fisted into her hair at the back of her head as she continued down his chest, her hands roaming over him, palms skimming hard muscles.

Eyes rolling into the back of his skull, Derek was high on Casey's touch. He couldn't wrap his head around the fact this was currently happening.

She let her mouth and hands drift down, nails clawing at his chest along the way, until she reached his happy trail, leaving tiny little pecks dangerously close to the waistband of his jeans.

_Whoaaaa…_ Derek thought, alarm bells sounding in his mind as Casey's mouth kept returning to his waistband with intent. Subconsciously, his hips writhed in encouragement, his dick becoming uncomfortably hard in his pants as she repeated the same action, like she had a clear desire to move _lower_ but kept backing off at the last minute.

Was there a real possibility… that she wanted to have _sex_ with him tonight?

Like, _actually_?

That felt like he was making it up. And yet…

He gasped when he felt Casey's tongue against his skin as she placed another kiss right where his jeans had started riding down.

Derek’s responses to her were extremely satisfying, and Casey dared to explore further, dipping and dragging her tongue in slow torturous strides. She was so close to his crotch that his erection practically vibrated against her face. His fingers were twisting up tighter into her hair, his breathing ragged. She could tell he liked what she was doing.

Furthermore, she was surprised at how much _she_ liked it. She liked hearing every single gasp, his tight grip on her and the salty taste of his skin. She felt really inclined to go farther. She’d done _it_ once before (given a… _blowjob_ ) and it wasn’t that great, but she really wanted to do it for _him._ And maybe she’d like it better this time.

Lifting herself up with her hands on his thighs and biting her lip, she considered what she was about to do. She could see the clear outline of Derek’s erection under his jeans, and was tempted to touch it.

She caught his eye, looking for signs of encouragement while she dragged her hands up his thighs carefully. For some reason she’d expected him to raise an eyebrow, silently challenging her with a daring look. What she met was a curious, dark gaze, half-hooded like he was hypnotized, waiting for her next move.

It was almost as unnerving.

She swallowed thickly, her heart hammering in her chest, and pushed her hesitation away. She _wanted_ to do this. She wanted to know what he would feel like in her mouth, what sounds he would make. She wanted to see the look in his eyes when she did this for him.

Slowly, her fingers, now steady with resolve, undid his belt buckle, unsnapped the button of his jeans and lowered the zipper. Licking her lips, she pulled down each side, revealing the large bulge twitching in his boxers. She reached out, leaning her weight on one hand against his thigh, and wrapped her hand around his cock, stroking gently.

Without warning, Derek’s hand circled her wrist, stopping her. She looked up again, confused.

Derek blinked down at her.

_Why._

_Why_ did he _stop_ her? What was _wrong_ with him?!

Casey stared back up at him questioningly, hand still wrapped around his dick over his boxers.

"Uh…" Derek’s words failed him.

Something didn't feel right, and he knew exactly what it was.

In his grand plans of wooing Casey, he was determined to do it the _right_ way. The way he imagined she dreamed of in her gooey sentimental brain.

Sex with Casey couldn't be some rushed, undefined thing. She was a romantic. And while Derek never really considered _himself_ one, he still wanted to be that _for_ _her_.

It didn't have to be candles and roses, but he had expected her to want to wait until there was some kind of declaration of love, or commitment, or at the very least, a definition. Casey had her life all mapped out, and there was a clear _order_ to things. He wanted to minimize any chances of regret.

The last thing he ever expected was for her to jump his bones, just pin him down and _blow_ him! God fucking _damnit_ that was so hot! He could seriously _punch_ himself for stopping it. But he couldn't let things continue without feeling like he was cheapening something important that was years in the making.

He only had one shot at this.

And he was totally blowing it. He realized he had been staring at her awkwardly for way too long now, her eyes widening with alarm.

“What is it?” Casey asked weakly, after an awfully long minute of silence. She gingerly pulled her hand away and placed it in her lap as she sat back on her heels. He looked deep in thought, and the suddenly serious look on his face made her anxious. “Did I do something wrong?”

Derek quickly sat up, shaking his head - both in response to her question, and to bring himself back to reality. "No!" The word rushed out of him in a soft reassuring tone. She looked so worried. He reached out for her, swiftly taking her by the waist and swooping her onto her back. She gripped onto his shoulders, startled. He lay next to her and propped himself up so that he was looking down at her.

Brushing the hair out of her face, he swallowed a feeling of guilt at the way her eyes searched him anxiously. "No, it's just…" he trailed off, realizing how incredibly nervous he was.

_Oh_. All air left Casey’s lungs, like she could hear the end of his sentence drifting off in the silence.

Did he _not_ want to…

She wracked her brain for any sign she could have interpreted wrong, but it was a struggle, because he’d kissed her like he couldn’t get enough. The way he’d touched her, looked at her… he’d called her _beautiful_ …

“I-I,” she stuttered, “I don’t understand. I thought…”

Shutting his eyes tightly, Derek silently cursed himself. God, he was freaking her the hell out and making her feel rejected all over again. He had to say something to fix this - he had to _explain_. But his palms were sweating and why was it so hot in here?

Pressing his forehead against hers, he tried to find his inner strength. Swallowing hard, he pulled back to look at her again. "Casey… If we do this…" He took a steadying breath, self-consciously aware of how shaky it sounded. "Then we need to…" He sighed, unsure of how to put it into words. "You need to know what this is… for me."

Derek’s ominous words did nothing to appease the burning inside Casey’s lungs. If anything, she was getting more agitated. Maybe he didn’t like her the way she’d thought. But she didn’t need to _hear_ it, hear him _say_ that it didn’t mean the same thing to him as it meant to her. Of course, she knew what this was. She scoffed at herself. It couldn’t be otherwise, and she could almost convince herself that she was okay with it. But _hearing_ it? Why would he do this to her?

“Der,” she shook her head animatedly, lifting herself up on her elbows to look down at him. “I know, okay.”

"I… _highly_ doubt that…" he said earnestly, scanning her defensive body language.

Sighing, Casey looked away, towards the wall. “You don’t do feelings. It’s just sex.” If she said it, then she didn’t have to hear it from him. “That’s fine.”

Something twisted in Derek’s gut as he blinked at her dumbly. If _that_ was what she thought… then...

That settled it. He was _much_ more confident with his decision to stop her. He had to set the record straight before they did anything. He couldn't cross that line with her and let her get away with believing it meant _nothing_ to him! The very idea of it meaning _nothing_ was offensive to him.

"No, Casey. You _don't_ know," he insisted, turning her chin with his index finger. Her eyes were downturned. "Case…" he whispered, his mouth dry.

Heart suddenly hammering in her chest, she looked up.

When her eyes connected with his, Derek's heart nearly stopped, his blood running cold as he was saturated with fear.

She had to _know_.

"I love you," he finally said, the words roaring in his ears.

Feeling as if something exploded inside of her, Casey fell onto her back, arms failing her as she reeled back from the blow. She stared incredulously at his mouth where the words came from, like she could have somehow misheard him. “What?”

With nervous fingers tracing idle circles over Casey's skin, Derek never felt more scared in his entire life. "You heard me…" he murmured apprehensively.

“You lo...” Casey whispered, trailing off when the words wouldn’t come out. She felt a tsunami of emotions brimming behind her eyes. “Since when?”

Derek's eyes shifted around the room, his breathing shallow. Nothing would be the same again now that he confessed. He was out on a limb, and she hadn't said it back, so he was just dangling in the uncertainty.

"Um…" he said, clearing his throat awkwardly. There was a terrifying depth of unspoken truths attached to that string Casey was tugging at. "Since…" The answer depended on whether she meant the moment he _knew_ he was in love with her or the moment he started having those feelings for her in the first place, because he was in denial for a lot of it. Regardless, it all sort of blended together. "A long time," he settled on.

It was so vague but it resonated so right. Because Casey didn’t know when she had fallen for him either, but it felt like a long time.

The words echoed in her ears. _I love you_. _I love you_. _I love you_. Like a symphony, the most perfect song in the world; like words she had yearned to hear her whole life. She felt the watery smile break across her face, tears escape the corners of her eyes as she tried to blink them away.

She took his hand and entwined their fingers.

“I love you too,” she said, choking on a happy laugh as she tried to brush at her wet cheeks with the heel of her other hand. “For a long time.”

Derek's fear melted rapidly as her words took effect and air filled his lungs in relief. Something inside his chest expanded, warming him from the inside out. It was confirmation of _everything_ he knew existed between them - the sweet victory at the end of a long road. The way she was looking at him right now was so perfect it was unbearable, it was so intense it almost hurt. He kissed her through the awestruck smile on his face.

“Mmm,” Casey whined against his mouth, the kiss was like a final seal on all her fears and doubts. She grabbed his head, digging her fingers into his hair, to hold him close. She would always keep him close. “You,” she panted between kisses, “are so…”

"Mmmmannoying?"

She smiled. “Going to make love to me.”

His mouth twisted into a smirk as he rolled his hips on top of her. Hands roaming her devotedly, appreciating every curve, every inch of her skin, Derek ducked his head to place a burning kiss to her collarbone. "Yes, I am," he vowed in ardour, his words holding a promise of all the ways he would _show_ her he loved her.

Holding his head against her chest as he lavished his tongue over the tops of her breasts, Casey used her feet to push his jeans down his hips and legs until he was able to kick them off. “There’s also something you need to know,” she said, sighing in pleasure when he bit her nipple over her bra. “Just don’t make a big deal out of it, okay?”

There was something serious in her tone that made Derek stop what he was doing, coming back up to face her in nervous anticipation.

“It’s not a big deal!” she insisted, raising her eyebrows at his ridiculously serious expression. “It’s just…” She squirmed a little in discomfort. “Look, it’s my first time, okay?”

Derek relaxed, his expression softening over her. "Oh."

He had considered that possibility before - that she was still a virgin, waiting for the right time, but he never really _knew._

It didn't bother him either way but… it felt right that her first time would be with him. He would do it justice, make it perfect, since he knew it was such a big deal to her (even if she claimed otherwise). It was an important milestone that she would look back on forever, as a defining part of her life. His too.

He half regretted that this wasn't _his_ first time because the _rightness_ was undeniable. He threw away his own first time, and second, and third, and so on, in desperate attempts to forget _her_ \- which only backfired because it just made him obsess over her _more._ But he supposed he could chalk it all up to practice. He had some skills he could put to good use now.

Stroking her cheekbone in wonder, he decided he was going to put in every single effort to make sure she felt that _rightness_. With every word and action. Anything less than that would be wasting the once in a lifetime event she was sharing with him.

"It's okay," he said softly, cupping her face and pulling her in for a tender kiss, "I love you." It felt so liberating to say it now that he could.

Butterflies erupted in Casey’s stomach at hearing the words again, and something told her, they would never leave. “Good,” she said, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. “Now show me.”

"Mmm, so _bossy_ ," he teased approvingly and kissed down her neck and chest. She sighed, her arms slackening.

Derek’s gravelly voice drifted to Casey’s ears like an autumn breeze, the appreciative tone bolstering her confidence and desire. It was transparent in the way his eyes settled on her, just how _pleased_ he was with her reaction to him. She knew he didn’t fail to notice the goosebumps rising behind the trail of his fingers on her skin. The corner of his mouth twitched into a smug smile whenever a sound escaped her lips. Although the sight of him was incredibly sexy, _god she was so turned on_ , she still wanted to smack that self satisfied look off his face.

And of course, he knew the _extent_ of the effect he had on her, because he continued to torture her mercilessly, taking his time to kiss down her chest, trace patterns with the tip of his tongue. His eyes never left her face. The worst part was, she knew he was getting off on rendering her useless like this, but it felt too good to fight. Even though the harder it was for her to breathe, the more his sense of _smugness_ increased (the _jerk_ ), his actions spoke of adoration and worship in a way she never thought to hope for.

His single-minded mouth kept its course down her body, leaving hot, wet kisses across her stomach. She could barely see through her half-hooded eyes but she still felt his undivided attention on her when he tugged gently on the charm at her belly button, holding it between his teeth. He was clearly taunting her, revelling in her helpless responses. As much as it irritated her, the whole thing was just _so hot_ she still found herself getting wet. That burning fire inside of her renewed with a restless need to have him.

To try and bring attention to lower parts of herself that required his devotion, she rolled her hips up against him. The light graze of her crotch against his chest sparked more pleasure, inciting her to do it again. His hands grabbed her hips to stop her, pushing her down on the mattress. He clicked his tongue, scolding her as he lifted an arrogant eyebrow, indicating that he wasn’t done tormenting her yet.

“I take it back,” she groaned, her head falling back against the pillow despairingly. “You’re still annoying.”

Derek was loving every minute of his torture. He lived for getting a reaction out of her, and _now_ , there was a whole new meaning to that - a whole new spectrum of sounds and reactions to elicit. He slid his palms under her back and moved up her body to kiss the underside of her jaw.

“And you’re still _talking_?” he asked huskily as he swiftly unhooked her bra. “Guess I need to step up my game if you can still form a coherent sentence.” If it sounded like a threat, it was.

Kissing over her breasts, Derek tossed her bra aside, getting a splendid view. He had spent a shameful amount of time imagining what Casey’s boobs looked like, and frankly his imagination didn’t do them justice. She was so perfect - she even had an adorable freckle bordering her nipple. He took it in his mouth, swirling his tongue and bathing in the sound of her gasping.

“You...re… unnfff-aaah,” Casey failed to articulate.

Her overeager hips began to writhe again, and Derek let his hand trail down her body. She whined as he popped open the button of her jeans and she practically whimpered as he slowly undid her zipper.

This time, as he reverently made his way down her body with his lips and his hands, he had a destination in mind, placing a kiss over the soft pink fabric peeking out through her open jeans.

Casey watched, a little anxious at having Derek do _that_ for her, because in her experience, guys didn’t like doing that (she wasn’t a complete prude, she’d asked). But she was also thrilled by how eager he looked, like it was as much of a treat for _him_.

She allowed her jeans to be removed, completely unprepared for what came after, crying out in pleasure when Derek’s mouth immediately found her clit, sucking right through her soaked underwear.

Ecstatic at Casey's reaction, Derek sighed against her. She was so turned on, the fabric dripping wet, and _he_ was the one responsible for it, which brought him a rush of arrogant pride. Pulling her cute underwear off, he placed a hot kiss against her inner thigh, the skin impossibly soft under his lips.

He was pretty sure he was in heaven as he looked up at her - incredibly gorgeous and waiting for him, a little impatiently from the look of it. It spurred him on immensely, his tongue reaching out to taste her.

She was a puddle in a matter of seconds, her fingers gripping the sheets tightly as Derek unleashed his talented tongue upon her, licking up and down generously. Each stroke sparked a delightful thrill through her body. If she had known there was such a better use for his smart mouth before, she would have shut him up years ago.

The amount of pleasure Derek took from his task could not be overstated. It was like a religious experience - from her impassioned cries, to her taste, to the way she felt writhing under his deft tongue, to literally everything about her.

Encouraging him by holding his head against her, Casey let her fingers dip into his hair - she would never get over the softness of it. She pushed up against his mouth just as he wrapped his lips around her clit, and the feeling was so divine she was quaking under him, the jolt spreading through her legs.

“God-ahhhhh,” she moaned, her shoulders sinking back into the mattress. She fought the urge to close her eyes, wanting to drink in the sight of him enjoying the feast between her legs.

The thrashing of Casey's legs was becoming a real occupational hazard. At any given moment, Derek was at risk of being suffocated by her thighs or knocked unconscious by a stray kick.

What a wonderful way to go.

The only downside was that she was squirming so much, his mouth was being bucked off like an amateur bull rider, so he wrapped his arm under one of her thighs and hugged it against his bicep, to anchor himself, as he put his tongue back to work. He couldn't help but look proudly up at her every few seconds, to find her watching him, with that expression of ecstasy on her face.

Sticking two coaxing fingers inside her, he grinned as her eyes rolled back. His fingers stroked her thoughtfully and passionately like an artist sculpting a masterpiece. As he felt her walls contract, and her thigh muscles spasm uncontrollably, his tongue picked up the pace over her clit, and his fingers persuaded her to the edge. The sounds elicited from her - wanton screams and whines, coupled with the squishing wetness of his fingers inside her - were like an erotic symphony.

Casey forgot to be embarrassed by how vocal she was as she declared her appreciation with various combinations of “Derek”, “Oh my god”, and “Don’t stop”. Any sense of shame was replaced by elation. She wondered if this was what she had been missing out on all along, if it was _supposed_ to feel that way or if Derek was just naturally gifted with the skills to make her unravel around his fingers and tongue, until she couldn’t formulate a single thought.

The only thing keeping her from outright wrapping her legs around his head to keep him there while she grinded against his face, was his tight hold on her thigh, restricting her movements. His solid grip was uncompromising, and she found that to be incredibly _hot_ (a thought she filed away in her overflowing Derek drawer). Under such restrictions, she had nothing else to do but to let go.

Her breath hitched as she let his fingers ignite her from the inside, the incredible sensation growing from the bundle of nerves at her core into an all out spread through her whole nervous system, with sirens ringing in her ears as she got nearer and nearer to the edge.

Suddenly, she was falling.

“Mmm-aaaaahhhh,” Casey screamed, welcoming the thrill running through her. “Der-aaaaaahh! Der-ek!”

For a second, she thought she may have blacked out, because everything went dark, and the next thing she was aware of was opening her eyes while the tremors in her limbs subsided to find Derek perched up next to her, observing her like he’d never seen anything more interesting in his life, with a proud smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

Licking his lips, Derek watched as Casey floated back down to reality. By the looks of things he really outdid himself - her dreamy, satisfied expression, the tiny beads of sweat on her forehead… She was a goddamn work of art.

Words couldn't describe how _pleased_ it made him to hear her crying out his name in pleasure, ripping it in two in her uniquely Casey way.

_Der-ek!_

He already loved the sound of her screaming his name, on a daily basis, bringing a lovely rush of dopamine to his brain every single time. Now, hearing it filtered through moans, gasps, and screams of ecstasy, was on a whole new level. It was probably his new favourite thing - making her feel like that. Making her come. Scream his name. Both. All of the above.

In fact, he couldn't help but make his appreciation known, leaning in for a reverent kiss while she was still catching her breath. He vaguely wondered if she could taste herself on his lips.

Ducking his face into her hair, he kissed the spot right by her ear that always seemed to get a resoundingly positive response. "Have I ever told you how much I _love_ hearing you scream my name?" he praised with a throaty growl, unable to help himself, really.

Blinking up at him, Casey looked closely at his face, half of it illuminated by the fairy lights, with the same playful twinkle in his eye. His lips were swollen, red, and glossy - that was _her_. She licked the taste off her lips, marvelling at how much he seemed to have loved it, considering it was just oddly bitter and nothing else.

She reached up to trace his cheek with her fingertips, biting her bottom lip. He looked too smug for his own good. She wasn’t finished with him quite yet. “Have I told _you_?” She said tauntingly, the growing smirk on her face mirroring his. “You talk too much?”

Without giving him time to respond - because two could play at that game - Casey leaned up and caught Derek’s lip between her teeth. She let out an almost feral moan, afflicted by an unexpected bout of possessiveness. She liked tasting herself on his tongue, a sweet reminder of the selfless offering he’d just left at her altar. For a moment, it felt like she _owned_ him.

“And I think…” she breathed just over his mouth, her eyes fluttering heavy with renewed lust - again, because she knew she would never be able to get enough of him. “I know just how to shut you up.”

"Oh _really_?" Derek asked smoothly over the loud anticipatory buzzing sound in his brain. His cock twitched at the thrill, over eager and tortured. He could hardly think when she acted like this - feisty and seductive. It was a version of her that felt completely reserved for _him_ and him alone, that chased that spark of temptation that had always been there between them.

“Mhmm,” Casey nodded slowly, letting her index finger trace over his jaw, then dipping under his chin and down his chest. She stopped to play with the elastic band of his boxers.

He shivered under her touch involuntarily and he _ached_ , needing to be touched by her. His mind automatically awarded Casey a win for provoking a reaction. As much as he considered himself the expert on getting a rise out of her, he knew he was _helpless_ whenever she turned it around on him.

His hand gripped her waist and he pulled her close firmly, clearing his throat with a growl to get rid of the strangled sound caught there when Casey's hand pressed up against him. "And how _exactly_ … do you plan on doing that?"

“How about... “ Casey said, raising an eyebrow challengingly as she retracted her hand from his hip to push at his chest until he was on his back. “I _show_ you instead.”

Her tongue swiped over her teeth, and she reached for the hem of his boxers to pull them down in one swift motion, his erection springing free. Her cheeks burned, eyes glazing over while she observed _it_ , big and twitching in front of her like it was just so damn _impatient_. When she wrapped her hand around his length, the tip weeped, and - how could she deny him this now?

She leaned in without showing any sign of hesitation, because she was damned if he was going to stop her again, and engulfed him in her mouth, swirling her tongue around as she looked up victoriously to catch the dumbstruck look on his face.

“Mmmmmmmm,” Casey hummed purposely, rolling her eyes back in exaggerated bliss while she sucked him off, sliding her mouth off of him torturously slow until she let him go with a pop. “Yummmm.”

"Aaah-hhh…" Derek groaned at the intense sensations sparking up his body. His dick had seriously never felt so sensitive before, nearly throbbing with years and years of pent up sexual energy. "Hhh-hh…" A stray chuckle echoed through him at Casey's coy behaviour - it was extremely hot to see this naughty side of her come out. His head fell back in exasperation, his breathing ragged. "Ohmygod…" he muttered, already struggling to hold himself together as she teased him.

Thriving at his reaction, Casey pulled out her tongue and licked up his length, appreciating the way Derek’s eyes fluttered, then wrapped her lips around him, slipping down until he hit the back of her throat. His groan encouraged her, and she couldn’t help her answering moan at the feeling of him, thick and heavy against her tongue.

She couldn’t tell if it was _him_ , or if she had been doing it wrong before, but she _liked_ it. He was so hard, yet his skin was soft as she slid her lips up and down. And the way he responded to her made her feel powerful.

Bringing her hand into play, she curled it around his cock, squeezing as it followed the movements of her mouth on him. When she felt his fingers in her hair, gently guiding her head, she closed her eyes.

"Hnnng - aaah" Derek groaned at the overwhelming stimulation. "God, you're so -" he struggled to speak through his ragged breathing, but needed to voice his worship. "You really know what you're - aaah… doing. _Fuck_." It turned out she was even a Keener in the bedroom.

Casey hummed in appreciation, rewarding him by pushing her mouth forward to take him in as deep as she could, opening up her throat until she choked and pulled back with a sharp intake of breath, needing oxygen.

What the fuck did Derek _do_ in his life to deserve this, he wondered. She was so goddamn determined in her actions it was unbelievable, and she was anything but _virginal_. The sounds she was making as she worked her mouth over his cock, the way she responded to his encouragement, and the _visual_.

The _visual_ was something else entirely. His imagination couldn't have done better - and it had _tried_. She was taking him so deep in her throat, completely lost in what she was doing, and when she came back up and released him with a gasp, the mess on her face dripping from her tongue connecting them, was just so fucking _hot_.

"Shit, Case…" Derek moaned in anticipation, "I'm gonna - "

She pouted up at him, wiping her chin as her hand continued a languid up and down motion. “Already?”

"Fuuu-aaahh….." It was too late. He wasn't _superman_ \- it had been _years_. And he might have been embarrassed or disappointed in his lack of stamina if not for the glorious sight of Casey's surprised face as it was covered in his come. He took a mental photograph.

Blinking through the thick, warm liquid sticking to her eyelashes, Casey licked her lips, unwittingly getting a taste of his come. It was… interesting. Though unexpected, it wasn’t an unpleasant development. She deliberately swiped more with her tongue, hoping that would make him lose his mind.

Derek groaned, almost painfully and threw his head back. His brain was going to actually _explode,_ he just couldn't handle it. Casey's hotness was beyond his comprehension. "You're… so…"

“Hmmm?” she said, leisurely wiping her face and licking her fingers clean. “You gonna finish that sentence?”

It was like sweet torture, Derek laughed breathily. "Fucking _sexy_ ," he finished in exasperation, running his hands over his face. Then, he sat up and pulled her closer. "How do you even _exist_?"

She giggled, dipping her chin to her shoulder shyly. Hearing Derek saying things like that to her would never feel real. _Fuck_ , he made her feel so desirable, it wasn’t even funny. She ducked when he leaned in to kiss her. “My face is all gross.”

"You're cute," he teased, reaching out to pull her back by her chin. "Like that's gonna make me wanna kiss you _less_."

It was just too much, _he_ was _too much_. How was Casey supposed to keep any kind of propriety when he was like this? Clearly, she couldn’t. She was _on him_ within seconds, sprawled on top of him and kissing him frantically.

Derek wrapped her up in his arms. Simply, blissfully happy as they kissed. He could taste himself on her lips which was just insane because it was proof it actually _happened_. Running his finger down Casey's spine, she shivered, their kisses slowing down. "Mmm… so much for your first time," he crooned. "You're going to have to wait…" She whimpered against his lips. "At least several minutes," he smirked.

“ _Minutes_?” She complained with a flirty smile, “how will I ever survive?”

"Hey, I survived _years_ ," Derek argued sweetly. "You have no _idea_ how many times I've played this scenario in my mind." The image of Casey drooling over his cock was forever seared into his memory. "The reality of it was too much for one man. We're lucky I lasted as long as I did and I didn't combust the second you kissed me back."

“Fine.” She made a show of sighing deeply and pulled away, cuddling against his side. She ran a hand over her sticky face, smearing some leftover come down her cheek and grimaced. It didn’t look so tasty anymore. “Ew.”

Derek laughed lightly, running his thumb over her cheek. She _was_ a mess. A cute mess though. She pouted at him.

Looking around for something to help, since Casey didn’t have a bathroom in her dorm room, Derek noticed something hanging over her desk chair that would do the trick. He stretched out to grab the garment and offered it to her. “Why don’t you clean yourself up, _Princess_ ,” he mocked, fondly.

It took her a second to recognize the item, and gasped, quickly snatching it away from him. “I’m not using my favourite cardigan to wipe your… _stuff_ off my face!” she shrieked, offended.

Slightly taken aback by Casey’s bizarre overreaction, Derek looked at the cardigan again, recognizing it from the night before. “If it’s your favourite, then why was it hiding under your bed with all that… other stuff?” he wondered, sensing there was more to the story. “Including my orangutan shirt by the way, which makes you a thief.”

“I wasn’t _hiding_ it! I was just…” He raised his eyebrows at her. “Okay, maybe, but I only hid it there _temporarily_ while I mentally processed it’s significance,” she sniffed snootily and looked away. “And your shirt totally ended up with my things by _accident_ , and then I forgot to give it back.”

The image of Casey’s snooty expression, with her face still partially covered in sticky come, was almost comical and Derek had to hold back a laugh. It was also funny that she was totally deflecting about his shirt - it seemed like all the items under her bed had some sort of meaning behind them, that she hid away out of sight. It was adorable that she felt the need to lie about keeping his shirt on purpose when she was literally wearing his come on her face.

As an alternative, he found his own discarded shirt from earlier, bunched up against the wall. He offered it to her instead, wiping it over her eyebrow. “It looks hotter on you anyway,” he said smoothly. “What _significance_?”

She clutched the cardigan to her chest while she let Derek wipe her face with his shirt, gratefully. “That’s what I’m still processing. That it even _means_ something,” Casey said, closing her eyes when he swiped down her cheek. Her heart swelled, feeling cared for. “It’s stupid.”

By the way she said it, it sounded anything but _stupid_. It sounded _important_. “Casey…” he coaxed, concern etched onto his forehead as he wondered what she could be hiding - there was a small prickling feeling in his stomach that made him curious if it was about him.

It was new for them, to open up to each other without the use of riddles, or drinking games. But now that he told her how he felt, they didn’t need to keep up the act, and he wanted her to know that she could tell him things without him keeping her at a distance or making fun of her.

“You can talk to me…” his voice came out more shyly than he planned, still not used to showing this side of himself. "You know. If… If you want.” God, that sounded so lame.

Casey huffed a little laugh. He looked so concerned, it was adorable. By now her face was clean, his hand just hovering at the side of her head while he waited for her to elaborate. “I was wearing it that night at home, this summer?” She met his eyes, melting into them, the same way she had that night. “The last day. It was cold. I thought you were going to kiss me.”

“On the back porch…” Derek trailed off in realization, studying the cardigan in her arms. He didn’t pay much attention to clothing to be honest, but once she brought it up, he could picture it perfectly - the moment when he found her outside in the cool night air, bundled up in her cardigan.

He had sensed there was a lot on her mind, as they were all packed up and ready to head back to school the next day. He had joined her without a word, soaking in the moment together. The tension grew between them, as usual, as he tried to read her mind, but there was also a calm familiarity, just sitting in comfortable silence for a while. He hadn’t realized it was such a significant night for her, since he had a hard time picking any one memory from the bunch.

“Were you?” Casey said, breaking through his thoughts. She remembered feeling Derek next to her, and everything going so quiet she could hear his soft breathing. When she’d looked over at him, he was already watching her, slowly leaning in.

Nodding slowly, Derek’s gaze fell to her lips, the same way they did that night. “That wasn’t the first time I had to stop myself…”

He recalled the way he’d pulled back, abruptly coming to his senses and went back inside, pausing by the doorway to look back at her, leaving her with nothing but a sly wink. That was the night he really started conjuring up his grand scheme of wooing her. He couldn't just kiss her out of the blue like that and risk freaking her out - he had to play the long game if he wanted to make it work.

“Is that why,” Casey said, worrying at her bottom lip as she gathered up the courage to ask, “why you weren’t around last year?”

Derek went suddenly cold at the dejected tone of Casey’s voice. He didn’t want to revisit that dark time - not while everything seemed so light and perfect in the moment. “I guess so? It’s hard to explain...” He shifted awkwardly.

Frowning, she looked down at the fabric her fingers held in a tight grip. “Can you _try_?”

“I… I wasn’t around because… I-” Derek strained, a tightness forming in his chest. She sounded so _hurt_. “‘Cuz, I was stupid, Case. Okay?” He winced, hoping his answer was enough to satisfy her since he really didn’t know how else to explain himself.

“I know that already,” Casey grumbled, a wobbly pout forming on her lips. The only reason she was able to hold back the tears was that she wasn’t looking at him. It occurred to her that he couldn’t have devised a better way to torture her even if he tried, by leaving her. “I missed you… Idiot.”

The affectionate insult would have normally eased Derek’s nerves, but her voice was still watery, drawing attention to just how terribly he fucked up by ignoring her. And as he thought back on the year before, all those terrible feelings came back and crawled down his throat, choking him. He didn’t just _miss_ her, he longed for her, excruciatingly.

“I-” he coughed. “ _Fuck…_ ” he swore at himself, shutting his eyes tight and shaking his head.

She huddled closer to him, resting her head against his chest. “You’re not going to leave again, are you?” she asked, hiding her face in his neck, thinking of how cold she’d felt when he left her that night, and how that cold turned into a year long winter inside of her. “Sometimes when you leave, you act like you’re never coming back.”

Her words punched a hole in his gut. “No! Case, no...” he fretted, reassurance rushing out of him as he wrapped her up tighter in his arms and pulled her shrinking form into him. “I’m… shit - I’m sorry. I was never really _gone._ I mean, how I feel about you, that was always there, I was just... ” he stopped himself, knowing the distinction didn’t really change anything in the end because no matter how much she was on his mind during that time, she still felt abandoned. “I’m not going anywhere. Promise.”

He never realized…

To think he made her feel that way was heartbreaking.

“I was stupid for ever avoiding you. I just… I thought -”

Turning her head, Casey’s ear came to rest over his heart where she could hear it thumping wildly. She could tell he wasn’t finished, that he was struggling to express himself, but that he wanted to. That meant a lot, knowing how much he hated talking about his feelings. She waited, closing her eyes as his thrumming heartbeat filled the silence.

“I thought this wasn’t… you know, an option,” he managed, the words scraping out of him like sandpaper. “And if I just… pretended you didn’t exist then…” Voice trailing off, he felt Casey’s slow breathing against him, giving him enough strength to continue. “Then… maybe I could eventually get over it... you. But…” The knot in his stomach twisted at the thought of being separated again, now that he had her in his arms, it was a terrifying idea. “I was miserable without you,” he admitted, unable to truly express _how_ miserable.

“I know what you mean.” Casey nodded, sniffling as tears threatened to come out. She wished she didn’t know so well, just _exactly_ what he meant. But that gaping hole in her chest was finally getting filled up again, so it didn’t matter anymore. She wasn’t going to be miserable anymore. “But I’ve got you now. That’s over, now.” She looked up to meet his eyes. “Right?”

There was nothing more relieving than to know he didn’t have to go back there. He smiled at her tenderly as a shaky sigh left his chest. “You’ve got me,” he confirmed, liking the sound of that. “Good luck getting rid of me.”

Casey chuckled, shaking her head as she allowed herself to process what it meant. “I wouldn’t dream of it,” she said, leaning her head back on his chest and sighing contentedly. She had him. He wasn’t leaving. “I just wonder… what would have happened, if you’d stayed and kissed me that night.”

Derek felt the warmth radiate through his body. “Shit,” he mumbled in awe. “How much time have I wasted _not_ kissing you?" To think, all that time he could have had _this_ , and he was busy avoiding her or taking things at a glacial pace. “I thought for sure you would have freaked out. I should have stayed, clearly.”

“Maybe I would have,” she admitted quietly with a light shrug. “I just can’t picture it now. Things not ending up like this.” She squeezed him, her arms around his waist, the cardigan forgotten at her side.

It was so surreal to have the girl of his dreams in his arms. Not an if. Not a maybe.

After he saw what it was like _without_ her, he refused to let himself imagine any other future. So long as the possibility was there, it was an inevitability. It was incredibly fulfilling to realize he _got_ there. He was there right now.

So, why on earth would he ever want to picture a reality where they were anywhere else?

“Me neither,” he agreed, tilting her chin up to look at him. “And just a heads up. I’m not gonna let anything _else_ stand in the way from now on.” He ducked his head to kiss her, rejoicing in the fact he could do it whenever he pleased now, but paused before their lips met. “You hear me?” he stressed. There were still some… _obstacles_ they hadn’t discussed yet. But he would be damned if he would throw this away, for _anything_.

She nodded slowly, feeling something fill inside her chest, expanding. Nothing seemed worth losing this, not even all the things she used to be scared of. She didn’t want to think about what they would have to face right now, but she knew she would fight anything if she had to. She knew _him_ , and it was everything.

Allowing their lips to graze, Casey closed her eyes and whispered, “I love you.”

Heart soaring, Derek’s response was translated through his kiss. His hands trailed over her skin - he would never get used to how amazing it felt. The simple act of kissing set his every nerve on fire, it was unbelievable how much she affected him.

His renewed erection pressed into her thigh, eliciting a full body reaction from her. She felt him and instantly, the ball in her chest fell lower, urging her to press herself harder against him as the _want_ spread between her legs.

As she writhed against him, Casey felt Derek’s dick twitch, making her laugh pleasantly. “Has it been several minutes already?”

“ _Why_?” Derek hummed into her neck playfully as he trailed his fingers to her inner thigh lightly. “Do you _want_ something?”

“Mhm,” Casey nodded assertively. Her voice didn’t come out quite as evenly as she hoped, though. “I thought I made my demands pretty clear.”

His fingers traveled to rub over her clit and he rejoiced at the small gasp in his ear. “You’re so hot when you’re demanding.”

“Oh, yeah?” she smiled, biting her lip as she rolled her hips against his hand, a low moan making its way out. Her fingers tightened where they held the back of his neck. “Are you gonna give me what I want?”

Didn’t he used to have a rule against giving Casey what she wanted? Luckily, Derek wanted the exact same thing - but he would probably give her anything her heart desired regardless, he was such a goner, especially with her tight hold on his hair like that. He grinned at her obediently. “As you wish,” he said as he flipped them over to pin her down, his tone equally subservient and cocky as hell.

Casey squealed happily, beaming up at him like he was the only thing lighting up the room. She liked that he was as eager to please her as he was to take control. The sensual energy coming from him vibrated through her, intensifying the need to _have_ him building inside of her.

She kept him close, wrapped her legs around his and her arms around his neck, so he couldn’t escape. Their closeness was calling attention to every place they were touching - everywhere - their chests pressed up together, his cock squeezed between them and sliding against her folds as she continued the roll of her hips. It was maddening.

Derek loved the playful excitement radiating from Casey, and it gave him immense pleasure to know she was so eager for him. She felt so _good_ against him as his hips ground into her, his lips finding her neck. He _had_ to have her - he groaned in anticipation. “Do you happen to have a secret stash of condoms under your bed too?” he asked. Every second that passed without being inside of her was torture.

“Shit,” Casey moaned, Derek’s teeth finding the soft spot underneath her ear. “I don’t.” She was breathing so heavily she had to take a few breaths before she could continue. “But I’m on the pill. Is that okay?”

Derek pulled back for a moment. He was a pretty big advocate for safe sex, especially since his disastrous year before. When he went home for the summer and Sam forced him to sit at a walk-in clinic for a few hours to get tested, he realized how stupid he had been. Waiting for the results scared him straight. But thankfully, he was clean.

Because of that, he knew he had nothing to worry about when it came to _himself_ , and chances were slim that he had to be concerned about Casey. The thought of feeling her around him without any barrier, was incredibly tempting - he craved that closeness more than air itself.

Clearing his throat, he looked at her seriously. “Are you sure? I have one in my wallet.”

“Yes,” she said under her breath, their noses brushing when she looked up into his eyes. While she had always imagined herself being _more_ than responsible when it came to sex, she didn’t want anything between them. She trusted him, more than she knew she could trust somebody. It occurred to her that it should scare her, but it didn’t. She was safe. He would take care of her. “I want to feel you.”

He kissed her sweetly in return, and the burning anticipation blazed inside of him at the thought. He wanted to feel her too - desperately. Their kiss turned more urgent as he savoured the taste of her sweet panting breaths.

Her pants turned into whines as she continued to rub herself against him, yearning for friction. She could almost hear the words ‘ _I love you. I love you_ ’ on his lips between breaths, the pure adoration he conveyed without words made her heart flutter. She couldn’t take it anymore.

“Der,” Casey whispered, catching his face in her hands to pepper it with kisses. “Please.”

She felt him envelop her in his warm embrace, cradling the back of her head with his fingers splayed deliciously into her hair. She closed her eyes, leaning into his gentle touch as his other hand travelled down her side and reached her thigh, holding onto her as he adjusted his position. He pressed into her, dangerously close, yet devastatingly not close _enough_.

He cut her whimper off with a light kiss. Pulling back, he looked into her eyes again, holding her gaze hostage. “Are you _sure_?” he asked once more, with the utmost tenderness.

_God_ , he was killing her. Where had this soft, gentle Derek been hiding her whole life? As if she hadn’t been looking for him. She wanted him. She was ready, so ready it was almost painful. “Yes,” she choked out, barely recognizing her own voice. “Please. _Please_.”

Pulling her forehead against his, he paused, letting the silence and the moment sink in before moving his hips, pressing forward. The tip of his cock dipped into her, stretching her walls taut around him, and she closed her eyes against the discomfort. It surprisingly didn’t hurt, but she’d never had anything so… big… in there… obviously.

He stopped halfway, pushing her head back so he could look at her. She felt his eyes on her through her closed eyelids. “You okay?” he checked, to which she nodded and instinctively pulled him in with her feet hooked behind his thighs, urging him in deeper until he was completely buried inside of her, finally.

When he didn’t move further, she forced her eyelids open. He was propped up on his elbows, watching her carefully. “Derek,” Casey warned, injecting as much contempt in her tone as she could - which wasn’t much, “if you don’t start moving, I swear to g- aaaahh!” she gasped, taken by surprise by an intense jolt of pleasure when he slammed his hips into her, his cock hitting hard and deep inside. “Oh.”

Derek smirked at her response. She was so damn _impatient_.

He couldn’t _really_ blame her, he was pretty impatient himself. But forgive him for having a _moment!_ When he found himself enveloped in her, it was like he was struck with a strange sense of _belonging_. They just fit together so well, it was so _right_. He was _home_.

It was fucking cheesy.

Maybe, out of the two of them, _he_ was the hopeless romantic.

Ugh, _fine_.

While he truly _loved_ how bossy and impatient she was, he couldn’t condone it, on principle, and he needed to shut up any complaints with the controlled movement of his hips - to show her who was _really_ running things right now. His breath hitched as he thrust into her - it was better than he ever imagined. Her gasps were wild and unfiltered. After a few strokes, he was confident she had lost the ability to speak.

"I didn’t quite catch that,” he breathed in her ear.

“Nngg,” Casey moaned, pulling on his hair as punishment when her words failed her. He groaned appreciatively, which was _not_ the goal, but it was like winning just the same. She felt the rumble of his ribcage against her chest, his breath tickling her neck, and while he kept pushing back and forth, she felt every inch of him broaching the inside of her walls, like scratching against raw nerves, each thrust igniting her desire for more. “ _Jerk_ ,” she managed eventually.

Maybe it was the way she tightened around him when she insulted him, or maybe he just had a kink for being talked down to by her, but Derek couldn’t help but moan loudly at her words. As punishment (or reward), he bucked his hips into her roughly, provoking a loud cry of ecstasy.

He found her wrists and pinned them above her head, then laced his fingers in hers as he moved deliberately inside her. After his embarrassing lack of stamina earlier, he was dedicated to last long enough to give her multiple screaming orgasms, focusing on his every action like this was a championship game.

“ _Casey_ …” he groaned ardently, “you have no _idea_ … how long I’ve wanted you.”

Derek whispering sweet nothings in her ear threatened to make Casey’s heart burst. She squeezed his hands locked in hers, bringing her trembling lips to his cheek to press a lingering kiss.

While Derek may have had sex many times before, it was _never_ like _this_. His hips moved against her in slow rolling motions as the sense of connection between them deepened. With each thrust, Casey graced his ears with new delicious whines and moans, and he could feel the sensations building up and up within her. It was almost _tantric_ in its intensity and intimacy, unlike the quick, sweaty, impersonal fucks he was used to.

He cupped her face in his hands, appreciating the orgasmic look on her face, her eyes shut tightly. So fucking beautiful. He moaned and thrust deeper, more urgently, and her bright blue eyes opened, piercing him through his soul. She held his gaze as he picked up the pace, their breathing growing shallower at the same rate.

Sneaking one hand messily into her hair, he cradled her head. Using their momentum, he pushed forward and shifted her hips so that her legs were raised and securely wrapped around his back. She gaped at him in near disbelief, her eyebrows raising and knitting together as he pumped away inside her. She threw her head back but he had her firmly in his grasp, pulling her close and pressing her forehead to his.

"Tell me you're mine," he implored, his words coming out as a desperate plea.

Casey could have cried, for what this sparked within her. It hit her just right, somewhere unknown, just as his cock continuously stoked that fire inside she couldn’t contain. She wanted to be his. She _was_ his. Had _always_ been his.

Since the day they met, she was his to tease, his to taunt - his to love. She had never been loved like this.

“Yes - mmm aahh,” she breathed shakily, nodding through the sobs of pleasure that took her over, overwhelmed by every movement, every touch, every little thing Derek so generously gave her. “I-I am. Yours.”

Derek's hips stuttered for a moment and his cock twitched, it was like everything he ever experienced culminated and brought him to that moment. He could come undone by those words alone. But he powered through, intent on bringing her over the edge as his cock worked like a piston.

With all his concentration on sparking her desire and holding himself together in the process, Derek's mind started to slip and he was no longer in control of the words coming out of his mouth.

"God… damnit… Ca-sey… drive me fkk-nngg.” He kissed her desperately, swallowing her moans, his nearly incoherent words leaking out of him unfiltered every time they broke for air. “You're… aaah-mmm… so _fucking_ in… fff - lovewithyou."

The dam broke, Casey’s head spinning as she was propelled to a completely different plane of existence, where every single cell in her body was alight, and Derek’s voice resounded around her like heavenly music.

“Oh my go…” she cried, her whole body shaking with the ferocity of the orgasm coursing through her. “De… rek…” She clutched at him as if she was about to fall down a rabbit hole, everything around her disappearing except for _him_ , his weight upon her, and the torturous, relentless motions of his hips keeping her in a state of absolute bliss. “So-so… good. Don’t-“ she gasped as another wave washed over her, “-stooooop!”

Panting uncontrollably in Casey's ear, Derek kept his rhythm, utilizing every ounce of willpower not to come while she moaned his name in sheer ecstasy. It didn't help that her nails were digging into his back, unknowingly causing welts and scratches. The fact that it was _Casey_ leaving her mark on him, like she was claiming him, made it _especially_ hard to focus. That sweet little dose of pain humbled him and put him in his place, and simultaneously boosted his ego at the way he was able to completely overwhelm her senses.

Her nails dug deeper and he growled in determination. Making her come was his fucking _purpose_ in life right now. "Come on, baby,” he begged.

“Der-e-e-e-eeek!” The pitch of her moans increased severely, sounding completely wanton to her own ears, but her brain wasn’t able to process the thought enough to care.

Meanwhile, the sound echoed in Derek's ears, as his blood-deprived brain used its last remaining energy to save it on a loop which he would surely play on repeat for the rest of his life.

Closing her eyes, Casey hid her face in his neck, her arms wound tightly around him and her hands clenched into fists, and silenced her cries until they died down.

She just wanted to keep riding that wave of rapture forever. More than anything else, she wanted to keep falling and never let go of him.

“Oh… my… g...” she trailed off into a sob.

Derek slowed as he felt Casey's body relaxing muscle by muscle. The aftershock rattled through her as she twitched in his arms. Her tight walls clenched rhythmically around him. He let out a strangled moan, brought over the edge as he witnessed her current state of spent bliss. He finished halfway through pulling out, "Aa-aahh… ffuuuck..."

Falling limp into the mattress, Casey fought to regain her breath, staring at the ceiling, her eyes unfocused. She was still tingling all over, all her limbs numb, and her insides singing pleasantly.

Slowly getting back to herself, she could feel Derek’s breath in the crook of her neck, his weight anchoring her as he let his body cover hers, sated, while his warm come still dripped down her folds. She would need to clean her sheets.

His heart was beating erratically against her chest, and an incredible surge of affection overcame her. Derek was an incredible lover, unsurprisingly, yet it wasn’t just the _sex_. She doubted she could ever feel this way with anyone else, no matter how skilled they were. She completely lost herself in him, and he melted into her, all apprehension gone. His fingers had traced every inch of her skin, leaving his mark on her like a tattoo. The words he’d whispered in her ear spelled _love_ , the deepest kind.

Casey’s heart swelled, as if it wanted to break out and wrap itself around his.

God, she loved him.

As if they couldn’t be close enough - they _couldn’t_ , she looped her arms under his shoulders, pressed her cheek against the back of his head, and held him against her. He was warm and sweaty, letting out shaky breaths that tickled her neck. He was completely undone, broken down and exposed. She wanted to keep him like this forever.

“I love you so much,” Casey said, finally, her fingers gently dipping into the hair at the nape of his neck.

Still catching his breath, Derek let out a shaky, shuddering laugh. It was just… unreal. Too good to be true. There was always the end goal of winning Casey's heart, but it was one thing to strive for it as a future possibility and a completely different thing to have it be _real._ And as much as he had committed to the goal, there was a part of him that never believed it would actually happen.

He was half expecting to wake up, alone, to find out this was all a dream.

"I love you too, Case," he said breathily, muffled in her hair. He pulled back to look at her, finding her adoring gaze flickering over his features. "So much." She had no idea _how_ much, and for how long - how much _power_ she had over him. She could destroy him with it - but instead, her touch was nurturing and protective.

Casey would never get over how good it felt to hear him say those words, as if she’d waited her whole life for it. As if this was a piece of her soul she didn’t know was missing.

Adjusting on the bed, Derek shifted them so they were entwined together side by side. His one arm curled around and his fingers ran through her hair, as his other hand traced patterns over her skin - he couldn't touch her without caressing her.

"So, as far as first times go…" he prompted, his tone cocky since he _knew_ how much she had enjoyed herself (he really brought his A-game), but held a genuine curiosity about how she felt about the whole thing. "I think we hit the jackpot. What do you think?"

“Well,” Casey sighed, “it’s not like I have much to compare it to.”

Derek chuckled. "I don't think you have to be an expert to know how earth shattering that was," he argued contentedly. "I'm pretty sure we unlocked a whole new level of human satisfaction."

“Oh you think you were that good, huh?”

"I think _you_ were that good," he corrected smoothly, licking his lips as his eyes roamed her face, watching her smug look turn sheepish.

Feeling a rush of heat at her cheeks, she hid her face in the pillow, overwhelmed. “You’re unbelievable,” she said, shaking her head. She looked back at him with a shy, teasing smile. “I bet you say that to all the girls.”

Derek faltered a bit and a blush rose to his cheeks because really there was only one girl for him and he was looking at her. It was hard to say something like that though because he was starting to reach the limit of cheesy shit he could allow out of his mouth for one day.

"Just you," he said seriously with a bashful smile.

Biting her lip, Casey looked down at his mouth. She couldn’t stand it anymore. Grabbing him by the back of his neck, she pulled him in for a kiss, full and hungry, moaning as their mouths slid over each other. “Keep saying things like that and I’ll never let you out of here.”

"Ooo, I'm so scared," he teased, his breath tickling her before he took her bottom lip between his teeth.

“Hmm - you better be,” she hummed, before pulling away with one last quick kiss. “But uh…” she looked down, embarrassed, “I kinda need to, you know…” she nodded towards the door and whispered, “pee.”

He couldn’t help but laugh, she was so ridiculous. “If you _must_ ,” he sighed dramatically.

“Oh, don’t be like that,” Casey teased as she slipped out of bed, putting on her cardigan and wrapping it around herself. “I’m not done with you yet,” she said and winked. Her eye caught her laptop forgotten on the floor and she quickly picked it up, returning it safely to her desk.

Lounging in the nude, Derek propped himself up to watch her as she walked around the room. “You gonna walk out there naked?” he asked, amused.

Pouting, she looked down at her legs, the cardigan barely covering halfway down her thighs. “I’m just going to the bathroom real quick,” she whined, “if I get dressed then you’ll have to undress me all over again.”

Derek’s brain froze for a second. She looked so hot standing there in nothing but her cardigan and he just wanted to pull her back in. “Oh believe me, I’m not complaining either way.”

Raising a smug eyebrow, Casey walked out, making sure nobody was still circulating around the hallways as she made her way to the bathroom. She caught sight of the smile on her face in the mirror before she locked herself in the stall - a brilliant smile she realized was stretching wide. She felt so good, and happy, like all the tension she’d built up over the years had eased and gone.

She thought of Derek and the sight of him looking up at her as he lounged, naked, in her bed. He’d had the same smile on his face, and it was mirrored in his eyes - they were so bright and shiny, as if he had been looking directly at the sun. It was exhilarating to know he felt that way about her.

Having this with _Derek_ , that level of intimacy they had just unlocked was more than she had ever dreamed of, yet everything was suddenly so clear, like it was all finally making _sense_ , and she wanted to live in this moment forever.

She hadn’t been gone five minutes and she already missed him, wanting to be back in his arms as soon as possible. She hurried back, stopping to look curiously at the new message on her whiteboard, just underneath Derek’s.

_Get it girl_.

Casey felt her eyes grow wide, realizing that she had been _heard_. Oh, god. This was so embarrassing. Feeling hot and flushed, she slipped back into her room.

Derek had tidied up a bit in her absence, piling their clothes neatly on Casey’s desk chair and changing into his boxers. It was the least he could do considering the absolute gift the universe and Casey bestowed upon him. He would have to swallow any embarrassment he felt if she decided to thank him for it.

He sighed contentedly as he lay back down on the bed and looked around the room, grounding himself in the moment.

It was bizarre to recognize his own happiness as a shock. It wasn’t like he was a gloomy guy. If anything, he was quite fun-loving. But there was always this pit in his stomach where Casey was concerned - just an intense feeling of something being unfulfilled. That hole was gone now and he was resoundingly aware of how good it felt to be whole.

The door swung open suddenly and Casey re-appeared in a frantic state, blushing furiously.

“What?” he asked, sizing her up. “Did you accidentally flash your RA?”

“Um, no," Casey said, laughing nervously, “thank god.” Pulling her cardigan tighter around herself, she sat gingerly next to him on the side of her bed. “Was I…” she stopped herself, looking away as she shook her head. She couldn’t ask something like that.

“What…?” he coaxed. She was being weird. Did she think she wasn’t good in bed or something? Was she insane?

“Was I…” she hesitated, scrunching up her face, “ _loud_?”

Derek’s eyebrows shot up. “I mean…” he considered. His face morphed into a grin. “Yeah.” He shrugged. She had really been screaming his name there at one point. The thought hadn’t really crossed his mind though because of course Casey would be vocal in bed, that was just a given - it was one of her many sexy qualities.

“Oh.” With a little dejected whine, she hid her face in her hands. How many people had heard them? There were at least six other girls on her floor, she wouldn’t be able to show her face in the shared areas ever again! “Oh.”

“Hey…” he crooned teasingly, pulling her closer, her face still hidden. “Come on. It’s _hot_.”

She looked up from her hands with a painful pout. “One of the girls left a note on my whiteboard,” she complained. “They heard me! What is everyone going to think of me now?”

Derek quickly sprung up to run to the door, feeling a mixture of amusement and protectiveness, depending on what the message said. He had to see this for himself, obviously.

“Wait, no!” Casey jumped after him, thoroughly embarrassed, “You don’t need to see it!”

Yes, he did.

He opened the door to read the whiteboard and burst out laughing. He looked over at her with mocking sympathy at her mortification. It wasn’t _that bad_! If anything, it was a super supportive message.

Casey clamoured to his side, holding the cardigan around herself in her wild movements. Derek lounged casually against the doorframe, rubbing the back of his neck as he propped himself up with his elbow and sighed affectionately at her crazed attitude.

At that moment, a girl walked by them in the hallway, and gave them both a knowing look, taking her time to check Derek out in his boxers.

Frowning at the look the girl gave Derek, Casey territorially pulled him back inside, hiding him from the hungry gazes of the girls who lived in her dorm.

“It’s not funny!” Casey yelled, pushing him down on the bed.

Derek chuckled. He loved when Casey pushed him onto a bed like that - it wasn’t the first time, though now it had the possibility of meaning _more_. Seeing her there in nothing but her cardigan, fuming, all flushed cheeks, standing above him in her pure annoyance - it all just made him want to touch her again.

He sat up on the edge of the bed and hooked his arm around her knees, causing her to lose her balance and fall on top of him with a shocked squeak.

“It’s... a little funny,” he argued, running his hand over her side tantalizingly as he nuzzled into her. “Besides… would you rather your floormates see you as some kind of sexless nerd or…” He flipped her over so he was hovering over her and dropped a kiss to her jaw, caressing his hands over her. “As the woman having hot screaming orgasms with her sexy _boyfriend_?”

Sighing as Derek’s hands brushed her sides, Casey closed her eyes and snaked her arms around his neck. She only heard one thing of what he said. “Boyfriend?”

“Mhmm…” he murmured, his lips and teeth ghosting over her neck.

“I guess…” Her statement drifted off into a whine as Derek’s teeth sunk gently into the tender skin at her throat. “I guess the second option is better.”

“I definitely like the sound of it, yeah,” his voice vibrated against her.

“Me too,” she said, her body tingling all over as she wrapped her limbs around him like vines, lips against his ear. “I hope you know I won’t be satisfied with owning just one kidney now. I want everything else too.”

"Hmm…" Derek said coyly, "and what do I get in return for _all_ of me?"

“Isn’t it obvious, babe?” Casey smiled. “Just don’t sell me on the black market.”

**Author's Note:**

> Ask for a link to the dasey discord server! We’d love to have you! (In comments or message me on tumblr @realrollypratt!)


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